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Volume 448 - Thieverity 
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 April 7-9, 2001

The Patriot

He was prepared to shed blood to defend liberty. What separates American
terrorist Timothy McVeigh from thousands of other gun-worshipping zealots?

Click  Here

There are thousands, perhaps hundreds of thousands, of Americans who
hold beliefs identical to McVeigh's. He is a prototypical extreme-right zealot:
He hates and fears the federal government, worships guns, fetishizes "liberty"
(defined in almost purely negative terms, as freedom from external interference of any kind),
embraces survivalism and sees himself as having acted in a proud American tradition of
resistance to tyranny that goes back to the Founders.

Throw in belief in the gold standard, certainty that a U.N.-run "New World Order" is poised to
take over the world, racial resentment and an obsessive fixation on Ruby Ridge and Waco as
proof that federal agents are jackbooted thugs waiting to make their final move, and the
all-too-familiar portrait is complete.

Isn't that the exact rant we hear from the vulgar Pigboy every day?
Waco, Ruby Ridge, Klinton and Reno coming for your kids?
Forced homosexuality, black helicopters, and, of course, "those niggers."

There's no difference between Pigboy and Tim McVeigh,
except McVeigh had the "courage" to do more than talk.
McVeigh is the type to hear and believe every Rush broadcast,
but he never figured out that Rush is an entertaining fraud who
doesn't give a fuck about anything but his next bank deposit.

There will be more McVeighs.
Pigboy, Hannity, Fox News - they all will have some responsibility.


Subject: X-Files is improving...

Last night, Mulder said something like this:
"This is America.  Just because you got the most votes doesn't mean you won."

Hey, he gets it -- and he's been DEAD for the past 3 months!

ha ha

I heard Mrs. BartCop chortling.
She heard it, too.

Arnold Schwarzenegger Gets Hummer

NEW YORK (AP) - You see a lot of strange sights in Times Square, perhaps none stranger than
Arnold with a topless woman sitting on his shoulders slogging through the streets in an orange Hummer.
Arnold and his ho will drive the vehicle on Tuesday afternoon to announce the $13 million bribe
General Motors is giving to the National Inner City Games Foundation. Arnold is chairman of the
foundation, which offers summer and after-school activities to keep young people away from violence,
drug use and pregnancy. They will drive the Hummer through Times Square and into ABC Studios.

 Check out what Media Whores Online is doing to Christopher Hitchens.

 Scaife 'n' Snitch

 Click  Here

 MWO also got a mention on Online Journal

  Klayman Trains Sights on DeLay

   Full Story

   Even though the Democrats wimped out on their racketeering lawsuit against Tom DeLay last week,
   Larry Klayman (R-No dick) said he plans to file a "no-holds-barred" legal action against him for
   allegedly selling meetings with the Bush administration to political donors.

   Klayman charged that DeLay illegally promised meetings with Smirk's policy-makers in a taped
   fundraising appeal to hundreds of small-business owners on behalf of the GOP Congressional Committee.

   I don't believe this for a second.
   He "plans to file" something, at some later date?

   Klayman is a ditto-monkey thru and thru.
   He's going to pretend to go after the GOP because he needs the publicity
   and there are no Democrats worth attacking since Clinton retired.


Subject: Stick to politics

Tiger Woods is the current champion of all 4 of golfs "major titles".
He is probably going to win more this year.
He is simply the best golfer on the planet today.
Golf's old guard is not happy about this for numerous reasons, tough shit.

Noone has ever held all of the 4 professional "majors" at once, it was not supposed to be done.
Just like the Bambino's home run record, but eventually records are broken,
new milestones are set and people learn to accept it.
Fuck the "grand slam" of golf,  we can now call it the Tiger Slam.

I realize I'm swimming upstream on this one.
Rush shares your worship of Tiger, because Tiger told Clinton to fuck off when he
wasn't invited to the White House until AFTER he won some tournament.
I guess the Tiger God felt he should've been invited when he was still nobody.

I'm nobody, and I'm not upset that I haven't been invited to the White House,
but then, I'm not burdened bythe delusions of godhood.

As far as I'm concerned, golf is almost as boring as basketball.
I don't comment on every self-important sports star with an ego the size of Laura the Unloved's,
but Tiger Woo is a media darling and if you own a TV, radio or buy a newspaper
you can't escape the constant, year-round, Madison Avenue Tigermania barrage.

You say the old guard doesn't like Mr Woo?
Maybe they don't want to see their sport destroyed by a lack of competition.
The camera never leaves Mr Woo.
He's the only guy on the golf course - why do the others bother to show up?
The endorsement money for the others is drying up, just like the prize money.
They should rename it the Tiger Woo Golf Association.

You know why the football draft lets the losing team have the first pick?
It's so prevent one team from winning every game every year and destroying the sport.
Baseball needs that, but golf can be destroyed for all I care.

You must be loving Pigboy's show today.
It's non-stop Tiger-worship alllllllll day.
Just like the networks, just like the newspapers.

I did enjoy the first half of your last sentence - a lot.
I wish more people felt the same.

 Tally Briggs / Actress at Large

 Crimes of the Poisoned Heart

 Click  Here


Subject: Lessons

Hey, Bartcop. I like your site because you don't pull any punches at the White House Squatter.
I read with interest the essay by Vincent J. Salandria and E. Martin Schotz  ("JFK'S Assassination
and the GOP Theft of the 2000 Election - Parallels and Lessons") in [today's] issue.

I know you're going to hate me for saying this...but the inevitable conclusions reached in this
article about the complicity of the Democrat Party in the erosion of democracy in America
are conclusions many of us came to long ago.

That's why we voted for Nader and the Greens.
The Democrat Party doesn't care any more, Bartcop.
They're pro-choice Republicans.
Even your darling Clinton acquiesed in some VERY Republikan actions.
At the very least, people who care need to vote for the Naders and the Greens
until the Democrat Party takes notice.

No other way to wake 'em up, man.

Desert Rat

Desert Rat,
I remember, a while back, making the comparison of a guitar player like Jimmy Page
trying to find a compatible drummer and bass player and vocalist and keyboard player
and a place to practice and a record label and a publicist and everything else,


he could join a group like the Black Crowes and play a gig with them Friday.
I think this is a similar situation.

Sure, we could build up a third party, maybe taking 30-50 years to do it
and by then the GOP would have all nine members on the Whore Court
and your man Ralph Nader would be dead or too old to run,


We could wake up the fake Democrats and win in 2004.

PS. My "darling Clinton" was fairly elected - twice.

Jay Leno calls Rudolph Giuliani "fascist"

The head of the National Ethnic Coalition of Organizations demanded an apology from Jay Leno
for his comment that Mayor Rudolph Giuliani was "fascist" to appoint a decency committee on art.

"I think it's terrible," said William Fugazy, chairman of the NECO and a Giuliani supporter.
"To compare him to a fascist, I think, is a disgrace."

Leno called Giuliani a "fascist" for appointing a decency commission to determine which art is offensive.
The comedian compared Giuliani's efforts to Adolf Hitler's crusade to remove "degenerate art"
from German museums in the early years of the Third Reich.

Fugazy said his group planned to mount a letter-writing campaign to NBC.
Giuliani's office issued a denial in German.

A Role Model No Longer

In 1988, I began listening to a wonderful, God-fearing conservative on the radio.
His name was Rush Limbaugh.

He was a great, moral man with unwavering values and beliefs. He believed our
nation was founded by men of faith and decency with God-given rights and freedoms.
I was a dyed-in-the-wool "ditto head."

After 13 years, I am no longer able to listen to the new Rush.
He no longer believes it's wrong to use bad language or sexual innuendoes on the radio.
He doesn't think it's wrong to swear or use God's name in vain.

He is still a fiscal conservative but now seems to be a social moderate.
He watches The Sopranos and thinks the show is great; a show with its
exploitation of sex, exhibitionism, murder, sadism, cynicism and hypocrisy.

The old Rush would never view and enjoy a program without any hint of concern
over the depravity it relies upon.

Rush can no longer be a role model for the youths of America.
I am very disappointed in the new Rush.
I will no longer be a faithful listener to his show.

Sandra Flint


Subject: Fwd: The Spin Room

Check out the response time (about 45 days) on a comment I submitted to the Spin Room.
Small wonder our efforts to get BC on went uncommented upon.
Next time lets give them a couple of months' lead time so that they can get it "in one bag".

ha ha

He sent his e-mail to them Feb 21.
His reply came April 9, and it was a damn computer-generated FORM letter.

 Thousands Hail Bill Clinton At India School Inauguration

 Full Story

 RAMPUR, India (AP)--Thousands of villagers lined the streets to see Bill Clinton drive through
 the dusty roads of north India to inaugurate a girl's polytechnic school in the hometown of an
 Indian-U.S. friend.  Girls danced the Bhangra, a robust peasant dance, after the inauguration
 and the dedication of the school in the name of his wife, U.S. Sen. Hillary Clinton.

 "I also grew up as a poor student in the United States. I became president of the United States,"
  Clinton told a gathering of students and local dignitaries after the festivities in his honor.

 "Long live Clinton," the people shouted.


 "Of course this means I've won the Grand Slam.
   I'll have all four trophies on my coffee table at the same time."
   -- Pigboy quoting the great Tiger Woo

 So, if A-Rod wins the home run title in 2001, and he wins the batting average title in 2002
 and he wins the RBI title in 2003, all he has to do is put the three trophies on his coffee table
 at the same time and he can brag about winning baseball's Triple Crown?

 Is that how Ted Williams would see it?

 I want to be a part of it, New York, New York

 New York Web Cams


“OK, here's what I think the problem is with George W. Bush and Karl Rove. After the 36-day
 post-election war, the R's kept saying to the D's, ‘Get over it.’ Although not kindly intended,
 this happened to be very good advice. The problem now is not that the D's can't get over it
 -- the problem is that the R's are in denial. They are in total denial of the fact that they not
 only lost the popular vote by fairly spectacular numbers, but they also lost Florida.”
     -- Molly Ivins

 This Time, it's Different

 ...Saturday Night Live so brazenly stole a joke from

 They were talking about the Spy Plane "crisis" that Cheney has fabricated
 in a cynical attempt to make Smirk seem like he knows what's going on.

 Last Issue, written Friday, I compared this China "crisis" with a little boy
 who lost his baseball in the back yard of the neighbor with a mean dog.

 Well, listen to SNL'sthievery of my backyard analogy:

 Click  Here

 Hey, guys, I don't mind you borrowing, but so brazenly?

 Jimmy Fallon owes me five bucks.

 Really,  he owes me ten, if you count last week's theft,
 But I like him and he's kinda anti-Smirk, so I might give Jimmy a break..

 In 33 days, I'll be in New York.
 I wonder if I should drop by the Saturday Night Live studios with a
 camcorder and ask Jimmy Fallon for the five dollars he owes me?


Subject: I Think I'm Getting It

Could it be that I'm starting to understand the agenda? What we now know is
that Bush became president and the stock market tanks, millions lose billions.

Bush promises a tax cut for the millions who hope to
get back their billions but only a few get the billions.

Could it be that the rest are gonna need their meager tax cut to pay for the increased price of oil,
gas and electricity that will also go to the few who get the billions to pay them for taking the assets
of the millions in Alaska etc to provide the millions with the oil, gas and electricity that the millions
own but they'll have to pay for through the nose to get from those with billions?

Could it be that the few that get the billions invest in the stock market at nadir making
 it rise and the millions rush back into the stock market to participate in the recovery,
inflating the price of the shares owned by those who have billions?

Would it be possible that an additional insurance policy for some of the wealthy religious is to get
the millions to tithe and add a 10% tax on their small wealth. Cripple government programs to
help the poor and provide "Faith Based" initiatives and you can tithe the unwilling and irreligious.
(Curious question: why should the poor have to tithe to up load money to the leaders of their religion?
 Why shouldn't the wealthy religions down loaddollars to the faithful?)

Could they polish this all off with an end to inheritance tax and there will be a powerful oligarchy
able to buy any court, any election board, any number of individual electors, etc. Potentially those
with billions will use their networks and their churches to convince the poorly educated that anyone
who speaks against this scenario is unAmerican or worse.

Could it be that Heresy would become a federal crime punishable by death?

Well, this is an imagined fantasy.

I know that this could not possibly be true.

...damn, wish I'd written that,

 Today in History

- In 1990: Ryan White, the teen-age AIDS patient whose battle for acceptance gained national attention,
  died in Indianapolis at 18.

- In 1992: Tennis great Arthur Ashe announced at a New York news conference that he had AIDS.
  (Ashe died in February 1993 of AIDS-related pneumonia at age 49.)

 ...but the GOP wants to cut AIDS research because Jerry Falwell says it's a "pervert disease."

 I say fuck homophobia and anyone who sells it...


Subject: Is it just me,

...or has our military had a huge string of unfortunate mishaps since that drunken chimp
was handed the presidency? Seriously, it seems like every three days for the last couple
of months there's a plane crash, a helicopter crash, an accidental bombing, or something.

The question is:

...are they doing this on purpose to try and blame "don't ask, don't tell" or some other
imagined Clinton shortcoming for the "failure" of the military, or have they simply got
a bunch of imcompetent idiots calling the shots?

More to the point, maybe it's just karma: Dummy's theft of the residency has
triggered cosmic payback in the form of the lives of innocent military personnel
valiantly trying to serve their country. Or something.

Keep up the good work BC.
You're a shining beacon in a world of gun-sucking sewage.


I noticed the same thing, this Vietnam crash being the latest.
It would be real nice if the Failure in Thief could go an entire week without innocent fatalities.

Maybe after a lifetime of having the gold bullion handed to him,
Smirk is now the bad-luck moron.

 Today in History

 - In 1994: Kurt Cobain was found dead in Seattle, a probable suicide.
   He was 27.

 ...and the vulgar Pigboy called him a "disgusting example of human debris."

 Hey, Kurt wasn't my big hero or anything, but for Christ's sake, he had stomach cancer
 or something.  With all his millions, he lived a life of intense pain.

 I've said it before - if I don't like a movie, I get up and leave.
 It should be a human right to end your life, if you're sane and you give it some thought.
 Maybe Kurt really wanted to say his goodbyes and make a doctor's appointment,
 but we can't allow him the same dignity we allow our pets.

 And when Oregon voted to allow common sense in treating the dying,
 the GOP federalized the law so the state's would lose their right to self-determination,
 just like Fat Tony did with our last election results.

 If Tiger Woo is so great, why do they have to lie?

 The CBS announcer said, "Tiger now has his Grand Slam."

 This is horse shit.

 Let me ask you a question:
 What's the current home run record?

 If you answered "seventy," you'd be dead wrong.
 In the last half of 1998, McGwire hit 42 home runs.
 In the first half of 1999, he hit 40 home runs.
 If you ignore the calendar and pretend, he hit 82 home runs.

 So, playing by let's-all-worship-Tiger-the-Republican rules,
 McGwire's 82 home runs has the record, right?

 If Tiger Woo is so great, why do they have to lie about his accomplishments?


 Cokieho: "Bill Kristol in The Weekly Standard says Smirk is just a scared, weak pussy."

 Dick Cheney:  "I think Bill Kristol is trying to sell magazines."

 Gee, Dick, ya think?

 Are you saying sometimes the media distorts reality to make a buck?
 Funny, no Republican ever used those words from 1993 till today.
 Your side has been the media's best friend for eight long years.

 What gives you the right to call them "whores" now?

 ...and notice it's only the Republicans attacking Smirk for being a weak pussy.

 On this same show, Joe Biden and John Breaux kept interrupting each other with compliments
 for Smirk about what a master statesmen he is, handling an international crisis so skillfully.

 Jesus Christ, isn't there one Democrat in DC who doesn't love Smirk?

Our Soldiers May Pay for the Tax Cut
   by JoeL

Click  Here

If the Bush tax cut or anything similar passes, there will simply not be enough money in the
next decade for the spending that will be necessary to provide for our common defense.
If that happens, America and all of us who are its citizens will suffer.


Subject: Your 12/1/00 Prediction

When I saw the following article, it struck me that you had predicted this a while back.
On December 1st, you wrote that Rove and Baker would manufacture a foreign policy "crisis"
to boost Bush's popularity.  It didn't happen as quickly as you predicted because the press
was giving Smirk a free ride, but sure enough, as soon as some negative stories started
appearing - presto!  immediate foreign policy "crisis."

Public Rallies Around Bush Over China Standoff

The American public has rallied around as he confronted the first major
foreign policy crisis of his administration following the spy plane story,
according to a Washington Post-ABC News poll.  64 percent said they
approved of Bush's handling the situation while 24 percent disapproved.


I think Smirk's whole life has been like that.

"Need a boost? Daddy's friends can make it happen."

 Today in History

- In 1999: President Clinton said NATO could still win in Kosovo by air power alone,
  and he expressed hope for an early release of three American POW's.

 Clinton - now there was a president.
 Everybody said, "You can't win this with just air power," so the GOP started screaming
 about the thousands of bodybags that would be needed to clean up Clinton's "bungling."

 He showed 'em who was boss.
 Clinton was always smarter than his opponents.

 I miss having a competent man in the White House.

 Something to Consider  from

 Click  Here

 Dave's "The CBS Enormous Band" was Friday night.

 Well, Dave had his big band on Friday.

 Did you know Dave doesn't work on Fridays?
 On Thursdays, Dave shoots two shows, with two different audiences.
 The show we saw Friday night was funny as hell, and I feel sorry for that nobody Thursday crowd
 they ushered out to make room for the lucky Friday crowd who'd get to see the big band magic.

 Dave: Paul, how many people were in Benny Goodman's band?

 Paul: Eighteen, I think.

 Dave: And how many people were in Duke Ellington's band?

 Paul:  Sixteen, I think.

 Dave: And how many people were in Les Brown's band?

 Paul:  Nineteen, I believe.

 Dave: And how many in the CBS Enormous Band tonight?

 Paul: Fifty!

 ha ha

 I guess that was the most fun I've ever seen Paul have.
 He wore a tux, and was conducting 50 people!

 Dave jumped on him once, when they did "The CBS MailBag," they did a flashback bit
 where Dave rubs his chin and the digital harp plays as he's rubbing. So Dave jumps on
 Paul for not doing the live harps, so Paul yells to the two lady harpists, "Girls, look at me!"
 Then he yelled "I need a C (unintelligible)," which meant, "When I indicate "Go,"
 start at "C" and rub that harp up and down."

 So Dave rubbed his chin and the harps went Dornan.
 Paul was in music Heaven.

 Funny, Dave didn't want to talk about the reason the big band was there.
 Paul kept goading him, giving him a springboard from which to launch, such as,
 "Gee, Dave, this band is nice. Maybe we should have them every night,"
 but Dave just let those comments go by without getting into Mr. Moonves.

 But the band sounded great!
 The strings and the extra horns and the harps!

 ha ha

 The harps, Dave was on the harpists all night.
 Once, he did a joke about the squirrels in Central park "sunning their nuts,"
 then looked at the elderly harpist lady and got kind of a scowl.
 ...and who can think of the word "harpist" without thinking about Doc Harpy?

 Meanwhile, over on NBC, Leno was doing poop and fart jokes.


Subject: Thoughts on some issues

Bart I didn't find that Fisher/Price voting cartoon funny, in fact I found it offensive.
It was obviously a swipe at those elderly Jewish voters in Palm Beach who were
screwed out of their vote through no fault of their own.  That is exactly the same
mocking attitude the smirk people and the gop expressed towards those people
and I'm surprised you would concur with it.  Those people weren't stupid, they were
misled into voting wrong.  The ballot that was shown in the media at the time wasn't
the same one that was actually used in the voting from what I remember hearing.

I'd say this falls under that "It's a joke" heading.
I doubt there's a joke anywhere that doesn't offend somebody.

Also I take issue with your jingoistic attitude toward the China situation.
Why should our European allies take our side?  What makes us always right?
They correctly view smirk with scorn and contempt and I'm glad they aren't saying
anything and making his fraudulency look bad.  And BTW we don't give any money
to them so threatening them won't work, they don't need us financially, times have changed.

Either I wrote funny or you read funny.
Europe IS silent, that's a slap at Smirk.
If I was Smirk (and I wasn't hiding my screw-up) I'd demand that our allies stand with me.
When you're right, that's an easy and moral thing to demand.
And you are wrong-city about us not giving other countries money.
Have you ever seen a German, French or Japanese aircraft carrier?
Every nation on this planet that's not our enemy is our dependent.

Also you say smirk looks weak and isn't sufficiently outraged enough,
now as much as I hate the guy what would you have him do, bomb China?

Of course not.
But if Smirk had nothing to hide, if his hands were clean, he SHOULD be demanding
every ally stand behind us. If the world's 40 biggest economies stood together and
agreed to boycott China, that would have an impact. But it's poppycock to think that
we, alone, could bring China to their knees.
You're beginning to make me think I'm not a great writer.

  Your attitude on this sounds like the typical right wing yahoo and I know
you are not that way.  In fact I think smirk's arrogance and unwillingness to
apologize and America is never wrong attitude is prolonging the situation.

If our plane was innocently flying in international waters, and a China fighter skyjacked it,
you damned right there'd be no apology from the US. If a mugger pulls you out of your car,
are you going to apologize to him?  Hell, no.  You wouldn't express regret if his partner
in the carjacking was killed, right?  We're being lied to, that's my point.

Having said all that I agree with you that the collision may have been staged for the purpose
of reviving the cold war and making China into an enemy in order to create an excuse for the
missle defense shield, selling arms to Taiwan and getting new profits for military contracters.

"May have been" is a good way to put that.
We don't know, but it looks suspicious as hell.
Why are we showing regret for the skyjackers?

And finally do you really believe that phony hypnotist on Howard Stern is for real?

ha ha
I'll bet my Chinaco on that guy.
Remember, I've seen him at least three times.
I've seen him hypnotize ten people.
Those people can not act that well.

Dustin Hoffamn, Gary Sinise, Yaphet Khoto, Tom Hanks, Al Pacino, Andre Brougher, Ed Harris,
Marlon Brando, Samuel L Jackson and Charlton Heston (psyche) can't act like those people.
You must've said that just to get a reaction, or else you've never seen him work.
For you to have said what you said, you've have to take the position that hypnotism, itself,
is a fraud, and that's just not true. C'mon, admit it, you're pulling Ol' BartCop's lariat, right?

When I compare somebody to Robbie Knievel and Jimmy Page,
 I am not kidding.


 Read the  Previous Issue

 It had everything.

 Copyright © 2001,
   Thanks for the fumble, Dude.

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