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Weekend-Monday,  Oct 1-3,  2011     Vol 2762 - Romoaner


In Today's Tequila Treehouse...

Arrow Slappy caught cheating AGAIN
Arrow Perry's 'Niggerhead' Ranch
Sarah Palin Nude!!!
Arrow Assassinating Awlaki
Arrow Christie may run for White House
Arrow What to do about Obama?
Arrow Spend the day w/ Cindy Crawford


Better than Communism...definitely better than Reaganomics:


A regulated free market economic system for democracy


"It’s gotten so bad, you can actually say a Republican president - with a Democratic Senate
  - would produce less bad results than the present situation. That’s how bollixed stuff has gone.”
--  Ralph Nader, who has always hated the Democrats    Link

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Slappy caught cheating AGAIN
He's the crookedest and stupidest judge ever


Democratic lawmakers on Thursday called for a federal investigation into Clarence "Slappy" Thomas'
failure to report hundreds of thousands of dollars on annual financial disclosure forms.

Led by Rep. Louise Slaughter (D-N.Y.), 20 House Democrats sent a letter to the Judicial Conference
-- the entity that frames guidelines for the administration of federal courts -- requesting that they refer
the matter of Slappy's non-compliance with the Ethics Act of 1978 to the Department of Justice.

The letter outlines how, throughout his 20-year tenure on the Supreme Court, Slappy routinely checked
a box titled "none" on his annual financial disclosure forms, indicating that his wife had received no income.
But in reality, she earned nearly $700,000 from the Heritage Foundation from 2003 to 2007 alone.

Slaughter called it "absurd" to suggest that Thomas may not have known how to fill out the forms.

Do we have a mechanism to getting rid of super-crooked, moronic, on-the-take judges?

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Perry's 'Niggerhead' Hunting Ranch
Guess what they hunted at Niggerhead Hunting Ranch?


In the early years of his political career, Rick Perry began hosting fellow lawmakers, friends and
big tobacco bag men at his family’s secluded West Texas hunting camp, a place known by the name
painted in block letters across a large, flat rock standing upright at its gated entrance.

“Niggerhead,” it read.

The name did not change for years after it became associated with Rick Perry, first as a private citizen,
then as a state official and finally as Texas governor. Some locals still call it that. As recently as this
summer, the slablike rock remained by the gated entrance to the camp.

This is great news for Perry.

Expect his approval to go up ten points with Teabaggers.

This way, word gets out that Perry knows just what to do with "those niggers."
I assume he masturbates to the thought of hunting down the Obamas on his ranch.

Send e-mail to Bart

Subject: Those jailed "hikers"

Hi Bart,

Looks like you were right about those "hikers" caught on the Iran/Iraq border. You wrote:

> I'm curious - are there any readers who think these two are NOT spies?
> Who believes they went to the Iran/Iraq border "to get some exercise?"
> You know why I've never been in an Iranian jail?
> Because I've never been stupid enough to go for a stroll in Iran.

One of them was just revealed as having an expat Israeli father and two brothers living in Israel.
The media knew this but concealed it all along.


On a side note, you know why I've never been in an Italian jail?

Because I've never confessed to murdering my roommate in Italy.

Send e-mail to Bart

Halloween is just around the corner!

Buy early - get THE costume you want!

If not, you'll get stuck with the John Ashcroft costume

Also, check out their
Sexy Halloween Costumes

Praying and God
 by Stugatz 


Send e-mail to Bart

Subject: Bank of America doesn't deserve a $5 fee for debit cards

Bank of America doesn't deserve a $5 fee for use of debit cards because they are trying
to punish consumers because the government is now regulating them, as they should.

It was just 3 years ago when Bank of America needed a 45 billion dollar taxpayer bailout
because they squandered their money making bad loans. Now they want to punish us
for the very regulations that are designed to keep them from doing it again.

As a Bank of America customer I want to say to them and the other banks we bailed out
that we have not forgotten, and that I really resent it. Making your customers angry at you
isn't a very good way to do business.

Next time you come to the taxpayer for a bailout
we'll let you die as we should have done last time.
  Marc Perkel

We needed a smart, skillful president - but we had green Obama, instead.

When the banks were on their knees begging for a handout,
THAT was the time to explain the new rules to the sons of bitches.

You don't hand the banks a couple of trillion dollars
and then sit back and expect them to do the right thing.


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The Decline of America under George W. Bush
by James P. Huchthausen
Discount code for 20% off: WZLH6SD


"All the fights Obama's had with Republicans over budgets and money, he’s caved unnecessarily.
  Should have come in like a house on fire… his first one hundred days could have more resembled
  FDR’s first one hundred days. He didn’t have to cave in on the Bush tax cuts, that’s ridiculous.
  He didn’t have to cave in on the debt ceiling fight.
Bill Maher, unhappy with Obama's constant caving - like most sane Democrats   Link


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Christie may run for White House
After dozens of denials that he wasn't


News about Chris Christie via the Newark Star-Ledger:

Gov. Chris Christie is seriously rethinking his months of denials and may launch a campaign
for the White House after all, a source close to the governor said tonight.

Thursday's report is the latest bit of rampant speculation about Christie's 2012 plans.

...and two weeks after he enters, the GOP will discard him, making him
look foolish and probably killing a once-promisng career in politics.

Besides, Christie is another Romney.
He's a gun-grabbing, gay-loving, pro-choice liberal from back East.

He's not going to get ANY teabagger votes and
the Teabaggers are running the damn show for the Cavemen.

Send e-mail to Bart

Sarah Palin Nude


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Subject: America - Eviction Nation

Hey Bart, I got evicted yesterday, I have to be out by (yesterday).
Wish me luck as a new homeless person.
 Robert W


Robert, is there anything we can do?
At least tell us what part of the country you're in.

Who knows, you might be near a Bartcop-reading, pot-selling, liquor-store-owning,
over-sexed, mute hottie who needs a manly roommate nearby to feel safer at night.

Or. maybe there's some grouchy old Bartcop-reading dude
who has a garage apartment that needs some cleaning up...

Send e-mail to Bart

"Even if they find Conrad Murray guilty of the murder of Michael Jackson
  he won't do much time in prison - look at Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan!"
some asshole on HLN

 Hey Asshole, Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan DIDN'T KILL ANYBODY.

 Those women are SO HATED you would equate them with murderers?
 I've asked a dozen times or so - why are these women (mostly Paris) hated so f-ing much?

 Replies usually begin, "Because she's rich and good-looking, because she thinks she's so hot,
 because she's never done an honest day's work"
which fits half of Hollywood.

 When people hate Obama and can't say why, I think racism.
 What motive do we assign to Paris Hilton haters?

 And I'm not saying you should like or love Paris Hilton, but many/most people
 would walk barefoot over broken glass to spit on her - but they can't say why.

  I know the answer, Bart

Subject: They told me I had Stage 3.9 Ovarian Cancer

I know you don't have time to read my story, but let me keep it short:

Two years ago I came down with stage 3.9999 ovarian cancer (killed Gilda Radner and Patsy Ramsey)
- it is the deadliest reproductive cancer for women. So, my situation was pretty dire.

Out of the woodwork came the Catholics, whether they be friends, family, or otherwise
. . . and they were there for me, etc. (major stuff) - And magically, when the doctors went in,
there was no tumor around my ovary.

True story. Caught the doctors off guard, and now I can read your friggin' fantastic website
every day and even get my writing on there now and then.

It is very hard for me to be an atheist at this point.  And, I ain't a religious freak, believe me.
In fact, we can thank all the religious freaks for the present state of America.
Rock on Bart!!

SP, I just found your e-mail (from April of 2009) sorry about that.

Forgive me, but I don't think "magic" was involved.

I don't know Bush about ovarian cancer, but if there was no tumor
I assume the doctors just made a misdiagnosis which happens on occation.

I'm really glad you're feeling better.

Send e-mail to Bart

Assassinating Awlaki
Obama Can Kill Anyone He Wants To?


Now we know what embattled Yemeni President Saleh meant when he said yesterday:
“We are fighting al-Qaeda in Yemen in coordination with the Americans and Saudis.”

The defiant Saleh, who’s long promoted himself as an asset in America’s seemingly nonstop
Long War on Terrorism (LWT), apparently knows what he’s talking about. Hours later, Yemen’s
military announced that a missile strike had killed Anwar al-Awlaki, the bombastic, American-born
Islamist who’s been linked to Al Qaeda and to recent terrorist attempts against the United States.

He’s not exactly OBL, but Awlaki’s assassination, and that’s what it was, is a signal that Obama
intends to pursue the LWT to the ends of the earth, regardless of the consequences, even if it means
an extra-judicial killing of an American citizen.

Not that killing non-citizens is kosher, but killing an American isn’t.

I'm OK with it.
That cowardly prick was training weak-minded sheep to kill Americans.

Fuck him.
I hope they ran our of virgins for him in Heaven.

Send e-mail to Bart

Subject: my opinion of Obama

Basically, my opinion of him hasn't changed since 2008; he's an empty suit.
He won the primaries on a lie (the Clintons are racist), and from what I hear,
he's surrounded himself with a bunch of opportunistic, sexist (why am I not surprised) creeps,
who are now all busy writing tell-all books about the dysfunctional White House they helped
create (but of course have no responsibility for). But if you want to know what I really think ...

I think a lot of people have buyer's remorse, but it's too little, too late.
I also think that the Republicans will not be able to mount a credible campaign against him,
given the field, but I could be wrong.

Anyway, once again I'll have to hold my nose as I go to the polls. I do, however, get a chuckle
these days from all the people I know who hated the evil Hillary and are now whining to me
about how Obama has sold out everyone who supported him. No sympathy here.

They got what they wanted; let them live with it.
Of course we have to live with it too, but why should we suffer?
 Ninja Librarian

Send e-mail to Bart

Check out the news and toons at

bart blog

  on the Bart Blog!

Expert: Drought could last 15 years
Obviously Texas isn't praying hard enough


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Business slow?
Time to advertise!

Banner ads by the day,
by the week,
or by the monff

Click Here to get more Hits

Even if business is slow,
let people know you're still here.

So, what to do about Obama?
We only hear from him when it's a Booty call


Progressives may sometimes feel like they're in a backdoor high-school affair with the President.
You know the kind: The popular kid will make out with someone from the wrong side of the tracks.
But he'll only take a rich kid from "the right kind of family" to the school dance.
Lately, Obama has made some significant moves toward the left, but the response has been cool
in some progressive corners. The skepticism's understandable. His 2008 platform was progressive too,
but after he was elected he tacked sharply right without even bothering to explain the shift.

Progressives don't want to feeling like the kid who 'puts out' in the backseat
and then is all alone on prom night.

Send e-mail to Bart

Today's Mystery Car


Last issue's Mystery Car Revealed      Link 

Bart, that's a Duesenberg J,
 Ed Roth

Send e-mail to Bart

Today's Mystery Celebrity


Last issue's Mystery Celebrity  Link 

Bart, Albert Watson photographed Alfred Hitchcock holding a dead goose
with a ribbon around its neck for the 1973 Christmas issue of Harper's Bazaar.
  Daniel the Lawyer

Send e-mail to Bart

Young Rick Perry and you-know-who

More magic from Astrocat 

Name that Song!


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Wildlife Close-up


Visiting our sponsors puts food on Bart's family...

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It was looking like the worst weekend EVER!

First, the Cardinals lost the first game of their best-of-five
playoff games.

In Game Two,
the Cardinal pitcher walked two of the first three batters,
loading the bases for one of baseball's most feared hitters. Soon it was 4-0.

Second, the Razorbacks were playing Texas A&M and they were down 18 points at the half.

And then the BIG one...

the Dallas Humps were beating my favorite team of all time (Whoever's playing Dallas)
in this case it was the formerly-red-hot Detroit Lions by what seemed like 50 points.

In all three cases, I turned away and worked on the page - no sense watching a massacre.

But then...

I turned back to the baseball game and the Cards were ahead 5-4!
Woo Hoo! 
All they had to do was hang on thru the 8th and 9th innings - and they did.

Then the Razorbacks were down so far but they clawed their way back to a rousing 42-38 victory. 
Beating any team from wants-to-secede Tejas always feels good.

Then yesterday - it was the BIG one.

The Dallas Humps were ahead by 24 points, but their magnificient quarterback, Tony Romoaner,
threw THREE second-half interceptions, the BIGGEST COLLAPSE in Hump History!

I was screaming "Hex on Thee" at the top of my lungs, scaring the cats.

The game was still in doubt when Felix Jones intentionally stepped out of bounds
before he got a first down which is wrong since that was fourth down - to end the game.

I was dancing the victory dance in my living room.

My e-mail was ringing off the hook with congratulations.

It doesn't get much better than that.

Cowboys suffer 'epic meltdown'




"There’s no issue about faith in Tony Romo, any place in this organization, period. …
 If you’re going to try to make plays, then you’ve got a chance to have some bad plays.
 But however we go, we’ll go with Tony. As Tony goes, we’ll go...”     Link
    - Humps owner Jerry Jones, vowing to stick with Romo forever, which is damn fine with me

It turned out to be the best weekend EVER!

The Humps are off next week so they'll have two weeks to mull over their biggest collapse ever.

Send e-mail to Bart

Today's Mystery City


Send e-mail to Bart

Subject: last issue's mystery city

Bart, Last Issue's Mystery City is Brooklyn, New York on 8/31/1954 (during Hurricane Carol).

Your good friend,


Send e-mail to Bart

Today's History Mystery


What is today's History Mystery? 

Send e-mail to Bart

Subject: last issue's history mystery

What is last issue's History Mystery?

Bart, that's Ted Kennedy after his 1964 plane crash.
 Therese O'D


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Subject: donation

Bart, I'm back!
Finally working.

What a country,
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Pauline, you're the best!
Thanks for being so generous.

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Spend the day with... Cindy Crawford
She put the 'super' in supermodel

Check out over  748 sexy photos of Cindy Crawford   in BC Hotties

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