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Bartcop.com
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Project 60
Dead
Brain Walking
by Isaac Peterson
Excerpt:
Ashcroft said that the reasoning was that
the cases involving minorities were more atrocious than whites.
He also said that the discrepancy in the
numbers happens because prosecutors seek the death penalty
more often in districts where there are
more minority defendants than whites.
There are so many holes in this logic and so many directions to shoot it down, I'm not sure where to begin.
Quotes
"FBI Deputy Director Tom Pickard has
been named Acting Director until a permanent
replacement can be chosen.
This came as a complete surprise to everybody except
of course the Russians, who knew
two weeks ago. "
"Actually Bush had a couple of other
candidates in mind, but Cheney had to tell him
that Moulder and Scully weren't
really FBI agents."
-- Jay Leno
From: chadbo2000@juno.com
Subject: Filtering
This is is probably old news, but worth
mentioning:
If you are at a site that filters certian
words (like bartcop), you may not be able to make a link,
but you can still get your point across
if you put a space between each letter (b a r t c o p . c o m)
Bruce
Reagan Memorial Suggestions
From: Vance
Here in Illinois, The Land of Lincoln, and
the birthplace of Ronald Reagan, we have the unique opportunity
to transform a monument to one albeit great,
but out-dated president, into a monument for two, including
our beloved "Gipper". with a little work
and ingenuity, the Abraham Lincoln Tomb could become a fantastic
Ronald Reagan Memorial. by mounting the
crypt that contains Abe's coffin on a large rotating spindle,
much like a rotisserie, President Lincoln
can spend eternity turning over in his grave, what with
Ronald Reagan being elected as a Republican,
the "Party of Lincoln".
Quotes
"According to the latest poll, 53% of
Americans approve of the way George Bush is running the country.
The other 47% said 'You can't
fool us, we know Bush isn't really running the country.' ”
-- Jay Leno
Smirking
drunk!
by Jim Higdon
Reagan Memorial Suggestions
From: Mark
I sent the Ronald Reagan Legacy Project
my suggestion for a Reagan
Memorial in my state, Indiana. Here is
the text of my e-mail:
'The death chamber at the federal penitentiary
in Terre Haute, where
Timothy McVeigh was executed. A plaque
with Reagan's famous,
"Government isn't the solution; government
is the problem" would be really nice.
And a picture of St. Ron blessing his apostle
Timothy would round out the picture quite well.'
Reagan Memorial Suggestions
From: Christian
"How about a homeless shelter to house all
of the mental patients who
got kicked out of mental facilities
when Reagan cut their funding?"
Quotes
"We all need to take a deep breath and
think about being a Bush daughter
and having that cross to
bear. I'd go out and have a couple of drinks, too."
-- compassionate Julia Roberts, to TIME Magazine
Stroke Me, Stroke Me
"Bush won more square miles than Gore
did last November."
-- Baconboy, second hour today.
That's right Rush.
Bush won Texas Wyoming, Idaho, Utah, Colorado, Carolina and Massabama.
Gore won New York, Southern California, Intelligencia, Pennsylvania,
Illinois, Michigan and Florida.
Yeah, your guy won the rocks and coyote states.
Al Gore won in the centers of education.
What a dumb-ass thing to say, "Bush won
more square miles..."
You're a moron, Pigboy. You know that?
Reagan Memorial Suggestions
From: Chris
For many years now, I've been assembling
a collection of horse and cow
droppings that bear amazing resemblance
to the late great Ronald Reagan.
I think a tasteful roadside museum or facility
would be a great way to display
this extensive collection as an appropriate
postumous tribute to such a great man.
P.S. (he is dead, isn't he?)
Quotes
"During the Gulf War, women in the armed services
failed to report to combat duty
at rates many multiples that of men.
When you don't show up for your combat
assignment you are effectively sabotaging
existing battle plans. On one ship,
the Aurora, 10 percent of the women
en route to the war zone got pregnant."
-- David Horowitz, (R-GothisasskickedbyJoeConason)
Mr. Horowitz, you have fallen into a trap just like Laura and the vulgar Pigboy did.
Mr. Horowitz, could I ask a question?
If our trained military personnel can't stop themselves from
having sex,
why does your party insist "Just say
no" is the best defense against teen pregnancy?
They are more mature than teenagers.
They have more training and more control than teenagers.
They are more responsible than teenagers.
But you say they can't control their sexual urges,
but teenagers should be denied condoms because "abstinence
always works?"
You, Sir, are either a liar, an idiot or a whore.
I'm sorry, I shouldn't underestimate you that way.
You could be all three.
CHANDRA LEVY HAD LOST HER JOB
Excerpt:
Missing intern Chandra Levy was distraught
over
suddenly losing a job she loved
- and cops are also looking for a missing
uncashed check, it emerged yesterday.
As the mystery into Levy's disappearance
deepens, authorities are trying to paint a portrait
of the secretive intern's emotional state
and the nature of her relationship with "close friend"
Rep. Gary Condit (D-Impeach). Detectives
have become increasingly suspicious of Condit's behavior,
and Levy's parents have said Chandra may
have been having an affair with the conservative congressman.
This guy looks more guilty every day.
Since he voted to impeach, he deserves no privacy.
I'd like to see the networks all over this guy.
...and where the hell if Fox Whore News?
The guy's a Democrat, (at least officially) so why isn't Fox pounding him?
I hope the Democrats don't lay down in 2004 the way they did in 2000 and 2001.
I spent most of the weekend watching the All in the Family marathon.
I had two thoughts. (That's a lot for me)
One was how much Archie is like Tony Soprano.
I'll bet Carroll O'Connor was a hero to James Gandolfini.
They're so much alike, except for Tony's multiple homicides.
They're both uneducated bigots who malaprop themselves crazy.
Sidebar:
Remember that time Tony was at Dr. Melfi's
and said he'd just been to see his friend
in the hospital, and that his friend had
a cathode tube inserted into his penis?
Damn, I'll bet that hurts.
If you think about those two, they're so similar.
The other thought I had was more of a question.
Watching Archie bullying Edith, I noticed he uses the Bible for
his excuse.
"The Bible says the woman must submit
to her husband - case closed."
But what if you're an atheist and you want to bully your wife?
Without the excuse the Bible conveniently provides, how does
the bully rationalize his brutality?
Reagan Memorial Suggestions
From: Kurtz
A bronze statue of Ronald Reagan shaking
hands with the
Ayatollah Khomeini next to Stinger missiles
and American hostages
"Fast and Furious" Speeds to Victory
The Fast and the Furious crashed and dashed to a whopping heap of cash.
The gangland street-race saga screamed in
with an estimated $41.6 million, making road kill
of Dr. Dolittle 2's talking critters, which
earned $26.7 million in second place.
The Fast and the Furious, Universal's PG-13
rated actioner starring Vin Diesel as leader of a group of
hotrod daredevils, averaged $15,830 at
2,628 screens, according to preliminary studio estimates Sunday.
Budgeted at a relatively modest $39 million,
the high-energy crime flick, which received mixed reviews,
scored bigger than even its studio executives
anticipated, attracting a multiethnic audience that was 55
percent male and 76 percent under 25.
Hmmmm, ...a male audience, under 25, likes
this movie?
Sure, fast cars will grab a boy's attention,
but so will Jordana Brewster.
Speaking of sex...
The new pictures of Halle Berry from Swordfish have hit
the newsgroups.
Apparently, in that film, she's working on her tan (??)
while reading a book.
It looks like somebody asked her a question, so she put her book
down long
enough to answer the question, revealing herself to the camera
for the first time.
I, of course, will not run these spectacular pictures,
because we support
Ms. Berry's dignity and we always take the high road here at
bartcop.com
Perhaps some burning political question will surface that can
only
be fully illustrated
by running these pictures, but until then, I can not and will
not let bartcop.com
become just another tawdry internet site to oogle the young babes.
Anna Nicole challenge will be allowed
A federal judge denied former Playboy Playmate
Anna Nicole Smith's (picture not available)
request to dismiss a challenge to a court ruling
that gave her $475 million from her late husband's estate.
U.S. District Court Judge David Carter, who is
handling the appeal brought by her late husband's son,
said Tuesday he won't dismiss the case. Smith's
attorneys had argued the size of the judgment was justified
because her late husband's son ignored court
orders.
However, Carter said such a sanction was extreme
and only should be undertaken as a last resort.
Smith, 33, lost a Texas court battle in March
over the fortune left behind by her husband, oil tycoon
J. Howard Marshall II. The Texas jury found that
Marshall made no agreement to leave part of his
estate to son J. Howard Marshall III or Smith.
The jury ruled in favor of E. Pierce Marshall, another son
of the tycoon. But a California bankruptcy court
awarded Smith the money before the Texas case was resolved.
Hey, the girl deserves some money.
She had sex with the old goat and made his last years happy ones.
If there's $475 million in question, give her $47 and shut this circus
down.
Besides, we all know what crooked cesspools Texas courts are, anyway.
From: Tamara Baker
Subject: Gary Condit
Good to see you and Josh Marshall (http://www.j-marshall.com) are on the Condit case.
See, the difference between Democrats and Republicans
is that Democrats punish their malefactors
and Republicans PROTECT theirs. (See George
W. Bush's life story for further clarification.)
Another thing: Yes, Condit did vote to make impeachment
possible, though at the last minute he
remembered he was supposed to be upholding justice
and voted against impeachment... kind of a
"have your cake and eat it, too" thing meant
to appeal to the knuckledraggers in his district.
For the scoop on Condit and impeachment, go here:
http://www.google.com/search?=condit+impeachment+Clinton
Meanwhile, check out what Josh Marshall has to
say about why the Washington Press Weenies
-- who savaged Clinton for letting Monica seduce
him -- let Condit get away for so long with his
non-denial denials about his potential involvement
in something that's far, far more serious:
the all-too-likely murder of Chandra Levy.
The difference (besides the inconvenient fact
that what Bill and Monica did wasn't a crime,
while the murder of Ms. Levy definitely would
be):
The Washington Press Whores LIKED Condit.
Still do, as a matter of fact. (Otherwise, this
story would be on MSNBC 24/7, and deservedly so.)
They like him so much that they were willing to
spend the first six weeks after his intern's going missing
by sticking their fingers in their ears and shouting
"LaLaLaLa I can't hear you!", even as Condit's
statements got screwier and screwier.
They like him so much that even now, his story
barely rates the occasional mention on network TV.
Why do they like him?
Because he was one of the weak Pink Tutus on the
Dem side who was perfectly willing
to bow to right-wing media pressure and backstab
Bill Clinton.
And isn't it ironic that his media buddies, so
quick to attack Clinton for carrying on with Ms. Lewinsky,
were so slow even to publicly acknowledge what
they, and apparently half the Beltway, already knew:
that Ms. Levy was Condit's girlfriend?
On one level, it really was about the sex -- but
on another, deeper level, it wasn't about the sex.
It was about payback for Watergate.
Among other things.
Tamara Baker
Tamara,
It seems to me that anyone who voted for more sex details in Clinton's
impeachment
loses their right to say, "But this is private"
when they get caught.
America - what a country
The reason they fly the new planes from the future near Area 51
is because it's so far away from people.
But, since this is America, where money is everything,
Lockheed Martin and Northrup and the others
have to file for patents on these secret planes - or someone
else can steal the design.
And when you file for the patent, you have to give them a picture, like this.
That looks a little like that F-117 those Lifetime Channel dudes
saw.
Check out this bad boy:
...and the forward swept wing aircraft.
Click Here for more details.
So, while they go to extreme lengths to hide their secret toys,
they also provide drawings for public inspection at the patent
office.
What a country!
All this talk of Area 51 is giving me Vegas fever.
Reagan Memorial Suggestions
From: Anne
How about a Ronnie memorial right in the
heart of downtown San Diego? Say, Horton Plaza, for instance.
That's where the largest contingent of
homeless people congregate in San Diego.
Thanks to the Reagan/Bush administration's
failed "trickle-down" economic policy, uber-high deficit spending and
"dumping" mental patients in the dead of
night in major cities, I think a tribute to RR and the homeless would be
in order.
Hmmmm, maybe a bronze statue of Ronnie with scores of homeless underfoot.
Ooooh, I can see it now...
Quotes
"A responsible leader is someone who makes
decisions based upon principle,
not based upon polls or focus groups.
A responsible leader is someone who says,
'Here are my principles, here's what
I stand on,' principles that will not change."
-- Smirk, lying his ass off
a few days before the election
"The president wants polling done to test ideas
before he has decided on them."
--Karl Rove, explaining how Bush is different
from Clinton.
Of course, Rush will say, "I didn't hear that quote" if asked to explain.
Navy
weighs Texas for bombing range
Jenna not the only one getting bombed
in Texas
Excerpt:
The Navy is considering moving bombing
exercises that have triggered
years of angry protests on the Puerto Rican
island of Vieques to Texas.
"It would be among the possible alternatives,"
Lt. Cmdr. Cate Mueller, a
Navy spokeswoman, said Friday
also...
Swear ...to ...Koresh
Did you see Oklahoma's premier embarsassment, (that says a lot) on Saturday's Capitol Gang?
Jim (Pissquik) Inhofe,
the dishonorable scumbag
They showed a video of this crazy son of a bitch (and I
choose my words carefully) talking about Vieques
saying,
"I talked to the people
of Vieques and they want us to continue to bomb their island."
Yeah, right, Pissquik.
I guess their cancer rates are going down
and they want to get them back up where they belong?
It's a tiny island, we have no business bombing it.
(Before you ask, Clinton had no business bombing it, either.)
From: rp132@msn.com
Subject: you
suck
you suck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Rodney Pittman
From a Las Vegas Newsetter
The Hard Rock Hotel and Casino pool has
swim-up Blackjack.
I guess you play with ...swim-up money?
From: fkoep@djam.com
Subject: Boston Impressionist Society
Did you actually "win" some type of award,
or are you pulling America's leg?
Since there was no link mentioned I assume
you are responding to criticism of your
Area 51 stuff with a joke. I don't
know for sure, probably because I'm not too bright.
Hell, I'm so stupid I voted for Al Gore.
Keep Hammerin' Away...
Frank in Minnesota...
Frank,
The joke was that if I paid THEM the $2500, I'd get the award.
How'd that come about?
My boss got a call from the National GOP the other day.
They said he'd been selected to be a "Man of the Year,"
or join the "Who's Who" or something like that - if he would
just pony up $10,000.
He didn't win shit.
It was just a fund-raising scam by the GOP.
Project 60
Quotes
"This patient's bill of rights bill is
aimed like a gun at the head of employers.
Look out! The trial lawyers are
after you!"
-- Don Nickles (R-Cro-Mag) Oklahoma's second biggest embarrassment.
From: joeve@bellsouth.net
Subject: BARTCOP BANNED ON CNN!
Hey man
I
was on the CNN IRC server the other day and I noticed that I couldn't say
"bartcop.com"
in the channel.
Thinking it was just a general ban on url's,
I just typed bartcop, only to discover that THAT is the word that has been
filtered! You could say "freerepublic," however. I also discovered
you couldn't say "michaelmoore" (the key word in Mike Moore's
website) though you could say "Michael Moore."
I asked one of the ops, he said he would find
out who handles that
and how I could contact them...seems like censorship
to me!
-Joe
Joe, we could make a list of places that have banned bartcop.com
It would be a long list.
Cheney Caught
Like a Rat
"He clearly lied," said one insider.
"I had a firm policy that we wouldn't do anything
in Iraq," he said.
"We've not done any business in Iraq since
U.N. sanctions were imposed
on Iraq in 1990, and I had a standing
policy that I wouldn't do that."
But now - the records have seen daylight.
Gee, who would've thought a Republican oil man would tell a lie?
Subject: Putin get's a Lewinsky from Smirk
Hey BC,
Isn't it curious that the whore press was all over Clinton for MFN to
China and Gore for visiting a Buddhist Temple.
Yet, when Bush comes back from Europe and tells the nation what a great
guy Putin is, they give him a pass.
Where are the requests for W's stained tie or the soiled Kleenex (or
KGB equivalent)?
Of course this is no surprise, maybe they are waiting for W to send
his daughters over.
dubbs
BC, PLEASE don't publish my email address.
I don't think Iowa State Univ would like it very much, bunch of Nazis.
Those
Were the Days
by Isaac Peterson
George II's Bad Week a Sign of Things to Come
Excerpt:
The number of respondents who say outright
they don't trust Bush climbed from 33 to 40 percent in six months.
The bad news for Bush continues. By a 2-1
margin, the poll found, Americans support protecting the environment over
producing more energy. Almost three-quarters
think Bush should take immediate action to stop global warming, and more
than half say he should sign the Kyoto
protocols. Seven in 10 back a patients bill of rights, even if healthcare
costs rise.
A whopping 57 percent believe his policies
favor the rich, compared with 27 percent who think he treats all groups
equally.
"On a host of issues," the New York Times
observed, "the respondents' views are closer to those espoused by Democrats
than those of Mr. Bush and other Republicans."
Read the Previous Issue
It had everything.
Copyright © 2001,
bartcop.com
Thanks for the fumble, Dude.
