Fair & balanced


Evil is real.
We voted against it,
but Scalia screwed us.

Leave it to BartCop

Let's Not Roll

Kiss My Ass

Cheney Leaving?

Ich bin ein Enroners

A Slut Named Laura

The Myth of the
Liberal Media

Make payments with PayPal - it's fast, free and secure!
   PayPal to  bartcop@bartcop.com
 .Support Bartcop.com
 PO Box 54466.... Tulsa, OK  74155



Back Issues
Contact Us
Project 60
Demo Underground
JFK Conspiracy
BartCop Sports
Chat & Post
BartCop Reader
New to BartCop?
Online Journal

Bart Cook

Your Ad Here
BartCop Store
Joe Conason
Gene Lyons
The Vegas Report
BartCop Books
Julie Hiatt Steele


Volume 725 - Waiting for my Moment

a weekly column about what's what


Friday     Feb. 22, 2002               Send Me an Angel                 Recent old stuff             Shopping w/ Bart

 Update from yesterday's  Squirm, Pigboy, squirm!

 You couldn't fit all I don't know about html on the internet,
 but that graphic that said $1000 last night says $300-$500 today.
 It was on my hard drive, but now it has changed.
 How do they do that?

 But, ...not to worry!

 When you click on the $300-$500 banner, below,  it says "Will Gold Surpass $1000.00?"
 just like I said it did.  You gotta remember, when I say "Swear to Koresh," it's still possible I'm wrong,
 but I'll never lie or play a trick on you when I invoke Koresh's name.

 Swear to Koresh, Thursday morning, that graphic read, "Will gold break $1000?"

 After I busted Rush, it reads : 
                                                                                            Click and you'll see

 Truthfully, this is good advice.
 When a Republican steals his way into power - buy gold!
 because it's a guarantee war and recession are coming at you like a runaway train.

 Enron's Voice Mail

  Click  Here

 Lots of mail concerning Zeppelin's "Rock n Roll" Cadillac commercial,
 and how it was considered acceptable compared to H & R Block's "Taxman."

 I had no problem with the Caddy commercials, and the new issue of Rolling Stone tells why.
 Plant and Page retained final approval over how their song was used.

 Zeppelin did almost everything right in their careers, but among the best decisions they made
 was having their manager, Peter Grant, play hardball in negotiations with the big money boys.
 Of course, when you can deliver the product that the other guy can't get anywhere else,
 you're in the driver's seat, so to speak, but Zeppelin always retained total control over everything.

 For the third album, they had that spinning wheel with the holes cut out, remember?

 Atlantic balked at the costs, Zeppelin said, "Eat it."    They did.

 When they released the Big One, IV, Atlantic told them it was suicide to release an album
 without their name or picture on the cover. Zeppelin said, "We do it this way or no deal."

 The fifth album was held up for months and months while they waited for the printer
 to get the colors right for the rocks those naked kids were climbing on.

 Physical Grafitti was another one - the windows on that New York building were holes
 that showed different pictures depending on which sleeve was showing thru.

 So, 22 years after the last Zeppelin studio album, they "produce" a Caddy commercial.
 I thought it was done with class and taste.

 Trick we're playing on the Weekly Standard

  Click  Here

 The Guitar God Tape

  Click  Here

 I miss Johnny Carson

 Remember when Johnny would say "He was so stupid..."
 ...and the crowd would interrupt and shout, "How stupid was he?"

Subject: A Dummy ...which will live in ignorance


In his address to the Japanese Parliment, Bush said the following....

"My trip to Asia begins here in Japan for an important reason. It begins here because
 for a century and a half now, America and Japan have formed one of the great and enduring
 alliances of modern times. From that alliance has come an era of peace in the Pacific."

There may have been a little dustup between the two countries due to
an unfortunate incident that occured around Dec 7th, 1941

Hear the clip yourself:

Click  Here

Tom L

Tom,  to answer the question, "How stupid is he?"  I'd answer,

"He's so stupid, it took America's whore press and five crooked judges
  to make this idiot the most powerful man on the planet."

 Bart Sticker sighting in Minnesota

From: cianderson@usa.net

Subject: You are a fool

Bartcop gets a letter noting that Global Crossing and Enron are both
backfiring against the Democrats. He responds,

> 'You're bluffing. I say we put everyone under oath, including Oil and Vice
> Oil, and if it can be proven a vote was cast or a policy was implemented
> because of Enron cash - we jail the b******s.'

Go four articles down. The fun has only just begun. The further the committees dig,
the stronger the scandals stink of Democrat and Bill Clinton.  If you want to read about
all the campaign money given to Dems from Enron in the last 10 years, be my guest.
By the time it's over you may never want to hear about India again."

Charles I. Anderson

I don't want to "read" anything.
I want everyone put under oath and asked damn tough questions about who stole the missing billions.

Funny - you have a problem with that.

  United We Slam
 GOP attacks Carnahan in the name of togetherness

  Click  Here

  And now, in this time of national crisis -- and in celebration of our unity, resolve and patriotic spirit
  -- the Republican Party proudly presents the following message of peace and goodwill:

 "Democrats suck."

 Heavy drama at the Olympics

 I was on the phone with Surprise Number Two and just caught part of it.
 Sarah Hughes failed to fall down and ended up winning the gold medal in women's free skating.

 What happened next is really the only reason to watch the Olympics.
 From what I've seen, it was the golden moment of these games.  When Sarah found out
 she'd won the gold for being the most graceful woman on the planet, she fell to the floor.

 Does it get any better than that?

 Sarah seemed a little bewildered, so her coach grabbed her face with both hands
 and got in real close and shouted  "You won the gold medal!!!"

 It's that kind of emotion you can't fake - to me that's what makes the Olympics worthwhile.
 Sarah's not (yet) a pampered multi-millionaire faking it for the 500th time.

 Matter of fact, emotion was splashing around like the Mexican set of Titanic,
 so what does whore NBC do?   They cut to a goddamn commercial - doesn't it figure?
 It what will probably be judged the best 60 seconds of the entire 17 days and NBC cuts away
 to do another "Can you hear me now?" commercial from the lying bastards at Verizon.

 So, the absolutely pure and honest emotion got the sharp ax from whore NBC.
 You gotta love rampant capitalism.

  Click  for Monkey Mail

 Yahoo Headline Thursday afternoon
 U.S. may deport accused Nazi

  Click  Here

 I was shocked.
 But then I read the story and it wasn't even about Rush Limbaugh.

 When was the last time you visited  mediawhoresonline.com?

From: toad@lrbcg.com

Subject: How about this?

Hi BC,
Didn't you know about Mike Malloy's radio show?
He's at ieamericaradio.com & click on live talk.

His show runs from 3-6pm EST, M-F & repeats same info 9pm-12midnite, M-F.
He can be reached @ 800-TALK-YES.

I found out about BC by listening to MM.
Mike used to broadcast from Chicago WLS late at night.

www.ieamericaradio.com   then click live talk right top of page.

He's really great.

Elizabeth in conservative wilderness N.Central Ohio

Elizabeth, I agree, but you put your finger on the problem.
Mike used to have a profitable mainstream radio show in Chicago, but he wasn't a flaming,
lying Nazi gasbag, so now he's on the internet instead of big-time, big-city commercial radio

The left won the last three popular votes, yet we have no voice on radio or TV.
The best we can muster is a small internet presence, and that's because Scalia and Ashcroft
 haven't figured out a way to shut us down - yet.      Something's reeeeeeeeeealy wrong here.

 If you didn't click on the flashing  link, you should.

 We have another celebrity recipe.

 Also, a note from Michele, the BartCook webmistress

BartCook has gotten most of the technical update that I envisioned.
We now have 131 recipes, all indexed in a search engine that I wrote the last couple of days.
The recipes are now cross indexed, so you can search on the author name, category, recipe name, etc.
You can also click on links in the search results pages to access lists of  recipes which meet those criteria.
It's hard to explain, but easy to understand, so try some searches, click some links and check it out.

We now have the Betty Bowers recipe posted (it's Funny as Heck and it *is* a recipe for cookies).
As well, we have a wonderful column by Greg the Liberal Chef on Pot Roast and Braising.
I'm hoping that Greg the Liberal Chef will be a regular feature. Finally, we have a dozen new recipes
including several by BumbleBeeBoogie, who is a regular contributor of these amazing, fresh,
different recipes. So do some cooking over the weekend and let me know what you think!

Michele K, In the Kitchen with Bartcop and Friends (a.k.a. BartCook)

Get your BartCop Stickers while they last.

Send a self-addressed, stamped envelope to
PO Box 54466
Tulsa, OK 74155

Donation not required.

 This Just In....

  CNN Breaking News

   -- Ariel Sharon announces plans to set up new buffer zones to protect Israel's borders.

  In layman's terms, isn't that just a land-snatch?

 The story says Sharon plans to snatch 200,000 acres of Palestinian territory
 "which we have deemed ...unsafe for their use ...at this time. They're such children."

 The Palestinians will be given paddle-toys in exchange for the land.

 In today's Vegas Report...


 Discretion advised - no kids, old people or cops.

 Plus, a new sticker placement at the Hard Rock.

From: okcanade@mac.com

Subject: Mike Marland

Do you have a link to, or a jpg of, Mike Marland's cartoon of Bush
flying the economy airliner into the WTC Towers Social Security?

I didn't see it on your site and have had no luck with a google search.

Ed Canade

Ed, no, but I can get close to that...

How about a hemp t-shirt that pricks our Failure in Thief?

                    click   to  order   Buy 3, get free shipping      click   to  order

 Why is Osama bin Laden still free?
  Was it always in the script?

 If Clinton was negligent/asleep/didn't care enough to capture him two years ago,
 why isn't Bush negligent/asleep/doesn't care enough AFTER 9/11?

 I'm going to keep hammering on this until a ditto-monkey gives me an answer.
 When you hear a ditt start ragging on Clinton - ask him that.

 The phony liar will either change the subject or start screaming "Monica."


 Breaking News...

 Las Vegas cops decline to press rape charges against Tyson, FREEING HIM
 to get his Nevada boxing license, so it looks like the BIG fight at the MGM is on.

 Poor John McCain just yesterday praised the Nevada Boxing Commission for honesty.

 But it looks like the town put pressure on the cops to not charge Tyson so they could
 get the expected $400M bonanza of a Tyson-Lewis championship match.

 Julie is back online

 Write to Julie at   PO Box 1351, Virginia Beach, VA 23451

 E-mail to Julie, use juliehiattsteele@bartcop.com

 PayPal to Julie, Click  Here  -> 

 ...and if you hear from her,  me.

 Mr. Bizarro, Airline Insecurity, and You
     by Al Martin

   Click  Here

 You may have heard about the story of Mr. Bizarro and his Unhappy (Bladder) Adventures on the way
 to the Olympics. The newly created Office of the Federal Sky Marshal Service, which is now a division
 of the Office of Homeland Security, has instituted new security rules regarding airline flights in and out of
 Salt Lake City. One of these security procedures is that, on any flight going to Salt Lake City or leaving
 Salt Lake City, you cannot use the toilet within 30 minutes of leaving or landing.

 Check today's 

 Roger Ebert scandal

 What if a scandal broke concerning Roger Ebert?

 What if Ebert praised a movie, calling it "the best movie of all time."
 What of Ebert said a movie was so good it would help every American family
  if they would just jump in the car and go see this masterpiece of cinematic perfection?

 ...and then it turns out Harvey at Miramax paid Ebert $1,000,000 to claim he liked it?

 Wouldn't you be outraged?

 Wouldn't you feel cheated?


 ...yet people like Bill Kristol, Ann Coulter, Larry Kudlow (the list is endless) are ALL on the
 payroll of Richard Mellon Scaife.  Washington is chock-full of these horseshit "think tanks" which,
 when you do a little digging, turns out are all funded by Scaife foundations.

 That way, when Kudlow says "this country needs a tax cut to get business going," he claims
 he's thinking independently, but he's really cashing Scaife checks every week.

 That's what impeachment was about.
 All these paid-for talking heads were reading from Scaife's script.

 And I pity the fool who'd try to challenge me on that.
 Somebody name for me a right-wing TV pundit who is not or has not worked for Richard Mellon Scaife.

 If we ask for honesty and objectivity from mere movie critics,
 why do we allow media whores to be on the Scaife's payroll?

TV Sweep weeks are underway
 That means it's fund-raising time here at  bartcop.com


 Isn't everybody ready for this to end?

Make payments with PayPal - it's fast, free and secure!
  PayPal to bartcop@bartcop.com
 .Support Bartcop.com
 snail mail to POBox 54466.... Tulsa,OK 74155

 Happy Birthday to...

                      Isn't this the best picture of Jodie Foster ever?
                     Those smoldering eyes with the (censored) gaze?
                     And those rumors don't hurt a man's fantasy at all.
                            See Jodie's new movie - Panic Room.

 True or False?

 Bush, George W.
 Recovering drunkard and cokehead.
 Not the brightest bulb in the lamp, and in fact couldn’t spell cat if you gave him the “c” and the “a.”
 The best argument against participatory democracy I know.
 Hypocritical moralist; Bill Clinton without the brains.
 Married a woman who killed someone in a traffic accident as a teen.
 Funded a girlfriend's abortion.
 At odds with his wife over how to treat his daughters' alcoholism.

I'm doing better now - no more nervous eye twitching for me.
Unka Dick gave me his personal guarantee that there's no
BartCop Hex hanging over my head like a sword of damn-o-peas.


Tiger Woods reacts to a missed putt while losing
to Peter O'Malley in the first round of the Accenture
Championship at La Costa Resort in Carlsbad, Calif.,

"I used to be God on the golf course.
 Now I can't make it past the first damn round.
 That BartCop Hex is some powerful voodoo."

Uh-Oh, there it goes again.
Daddy! Unka Dick! You promised!!!

Shopping online?
Use the portal below and they'll throw  bartcop.com  a nickel and
it costs you nothing more than whatever you were going to pay.

Search Now:
In Association with Amazon.com

 Read the  Previous Issue

 It had everything.

 Copyright © 2002, bartcop.com

 Shirley  Manson - contact  bartcop.com

Privacy Policy
. .