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Before we name
more schools & airports after Ronald Reagan,
"The American people are tired of partisan witch hunts and endless investigations."
-- Ari Fleischer, warning Democrats against investigations into Bush and Enron.
No, Ari, they're tired of the GOP's nine year Jihad against
constantly screaming about this being a "constitutional crisis" and how "the flag is falling"
and then coming up with nothing but a little consensual tongue.
but, ...that's probably all it will take to make the gelding Democrats shake in their boots.
and Yank at Enron
Or, the fine art of bankruptcy
by John Powers
"Naturally, many politicians buried their snouts in Enron’s trough, some of them Democrats,
but none so deeply as the Bush family and their associates. It started with Papa Bush,
whose secretary of state, secretary of commerce and director of operations for the
Joint Chiefs of Staff all eventually joined the Enron payroll."
Bleeth gets two years probation for drug charge
What a crock of miscarried justice this was.
I saw the sentencing on ET.
The lady judge remarked how beautiful and talented the bloated star was,
and how she could have probation if she stayed away from known felons.
"But Judge, my fiance is a three-time cocaine loser," she whined.
"Well, Honey, I won't stand in the way
of love," the judge said.
As Vance put it, "She's lucky that she's
not a poor black kid from Detroit,
and that mandatory sentencing under drug laws doesn't apply to celebrities."
David has another new edition of Project 60 up
If you didn't fight in WWII, you should read about the brave men and women who did.
Ho-Hum, Nothing Urgent
by George Szamuely
"He [the President] got out of his hotel suite this morning, was about to leave, reporters saw the White
House chief of staff, Andy Card, whisper into his ear. The reporter said to the president,
'Do you know what's going on in New York?' He said he did, and he said he will have something about it later."
And then he went to an elementary school in Sarasota to read to children for half an hour.
"You know, I've been trying to think
of something more lowdown,
more revelatory of an obsessed, shriveled soul the size of a dried pea,
than attacking another man upon the occasion of his dog's death.
-- Gene Lyons in an email reprinted in the Arkansas
about the conservative"Christians" going after Clinton.
Yeah, that's exactly what Jesus would've done.
Subject: Bart's 6-x / year in Vegas / CHINACO TESTIMONIAL
Man, I can't sponsor anyone to a bash like this,
but man, if you ever need someone to go with--let me know.
I'll pay my own way (wife included), and just hang with the Bartman.
Oh, FYI--I broke my own rule(s) of sobriety and had a drink while I was in So.CA. over New Year's.
I ate at a Mexican place that served Chinaco, so I paid a (much needed) fiver and had a shot.
You are truly a veritable bearer of wondrous tonic and Ambrosia from Olympus.
Bacchus himself poured that shot my friend, and I have made a New Year's resolution:
If I ever go back to drinking, I will drink only Chinaco,
because drinking Chinaco Anejo is not anything like drinking.
More as it happens.
(back, wiser and less employed than before
--know anybody that needs a college prof with a decent vitae to teach?)
That's what we need - BartCop classifieds!
Is this treason?
You're damn right it is, Funnyboy
''At one moment during the negotiations, the
U.S. representatives told the Taliban,
'either you accept our offer of a carpet of gold, or we bury you under a carpet of bombs'.''
-- Jean-Charles Brisard, author of Bin Laden, the Forbidden Truth
If the report is correct, Bush gave bin Laden his motive to attack
us on September 11th.
Will Congress hold hearings to see if this extremely serious crime happened?
Remember when they investigated Clinton's sex life constantly?
They said they did it "to see if a pattern exists."
...and that was about sex.
This is about the Bush Family Evil Empire using American
military muscle to force the Taliban to agree
to an oil deal that went bad and possibly killed 3000 New Yorkers as a result - so will they investigate?
And where is the media?
Why don't they want this biggest of all stories?
Granted, it's not as "sexy" as a Clinton story, but it's about a president, a crooked president
who used taxpayer money to force a bad deal and got thousands of Americans killed for it.
Why do they continue to protect the oil-crazy madman?
That's what bin Laden calls the President.
We don't like to be criticized, Funnyboy.
Your time is rapidly drawing to an end.
Remember, there ain't no tequila in Hell, Funnyboy.
Traficant got kickbacks, U.S. says
"Give me $800"
The documents also said Henry DiBlasio, the former administrative
assistant to the congressman, also returned some of his pay each month
to Traficant. He earned more than $85,000 a year before he retired.
DiBlasio denies that. When authorities questioned
him about the large
amounts of cash he took out of his check each month, DiBlasio said that
he spent as much $800 a month on lottery tickets,
We deserve this loser.
We didn't have the brains to force him out of the Democratic party, same with Condit.
Both of them vote against us more than with us, but we looooooove them and forgive them, anyway.
We don't want to win any elections.
We want to lose every race - we're begging to lose each race.
We're Democrats - in other words, we're losers
And when we win, we don't have the spine to take our victory.
We tell ourselves it's not worth fighting for and lay down.
How did I get in a party of spineless losers?
Subject: Partisan Bickering?
Monday night, as I was channel-surfing, I had
the misfortune to land on C-SPAN, which was
presenting that day's pronouncements from Smirk. He was complaining about how tired he was
of all the "partisan bickering" in Congress.
What partisan bickering?
The Democrats seem more eager to please His Highness, than the Republicans.
Maybe he is displeased that not all of the Congressional Democrats have learned how to
properly kowtow, when he holds out his hand and says: "Kneel before Dubya".
Good grief, where is Superman when we need him?
I'd settle for a mealy-mouthed Democrat with half a testicle.
Osama, Part II
by Gene Lyons January 9, 2002
The president hit his apex a few weeks back when Meet the Press's Tim Russert and Rudy Giuliani
actually urged Laura Bush to affirm that her husband had been chosen by God to save the United States.
The transcript of this ludicrous exchange, which has to be seen to be believed, can be found on the
mediawhoresonline.com website. Fortunately the first lady had the good sense to gently remind the
overheated pundit that God doesn't choose presidents. She was so gracious, I'll restrain myself from
snide remarks about who did choose him.
From: (withheld so Lanny the Lonely Stalker doesn't pester him)
Subject: Enron Field
You asked "I wonder if they'll change the name of Enron Field, where the Astros play? "
The two best suggestions that I've seen for a new name for the ballpark are:
Lost My Ass-trodome
That's funny, but probably not to the thousands of families
that Bush/Enron screwed out of their life savings.
The Bush Family Evil Empire - they always get theirs first,
then the little people scramble for whatever crumbs are left.
by William Rivers Pitt
There are some thirty one Bush administration officials who had a line item for Enron in their stock portfolio,
including Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld. It is fair to say that the woebegone corporation held, and
continues to hold, enormous influence over the day-to-day machinations of Federal government policy.
One wonders if Bush's recent gutting of the Clean Air Act, a decision designed to improve the fortunes
of companies like Enron, was the brainchild of people with deep connections to the energy industry.
Happy Birthday to...
Pat Benatar is 48 Janet Gretsky is 40
Also, George Foreman and Linda Lovelace (G-rated picture not available) both turn 53 today
Subject: PETA/Animals flying internationally
MOST countries require the animals to go through
a quarentine period.
For the UK, I believe it's six months. I think even Hawaii requires one.
I'm sure Mexico does.
You're just a dog hater - like Clinton - making excuses!
bought any books lately?
Could any of them be considered critical of any policies of the Bush administration?
You need to be aware of the anti-terrorism law our president signed
in late October.
Among other things, it gives the federal government the power to search bookstore records,
including book titles purchased by individual customers.
Just try to pull something on us - just try...
If that is not bad enough, this same law prevents
your bookstore owner or her lawyer from objecting
in court or publicly in any way, since this new law contains a gag order making it illegal for any
bookstore owner to disclose to anyone that he received an order from the government to produce any documents.
It's now illegal for a bookstore owner to speak to his customers?
Bush and Ashcroft have made it illegal to speak?
What's wrong with us?
Why aren't we fighting this?
Are we just going to take this?
It's now illegal to speak?
This is horseshit!
I knew when we lost our right to vote that things were bad, but I
had no idea...
These monsters have deprived us of Freedom of Speech, too?
I didn't see an expiration date on this insanity, either.
If the Democrats had any brains courage, patriotism
or self-respect, they'd spotlight this atrocity
for the 2002 elections and take back the House and repeal this Hitlerian horseshit.
Watch it, boy.
Anybody who gets out of line will see a military tribunal.
What do you think this is, a free country?
I'm talking to you, Funnyboy.
LOOK AT ME when I talk to you!!!
Go to Hell, Ashcroft.
You're insane and I don't like you throwing our Constitution away.
...and Wall Street hated Clinton's guts.
Christian Livemore tells me while she was without her computer
for 10 days,
she went to the local library to use their computer to answer e-mail and keep in touch.
But she was unable to access the bartcop.com
web page because the library blocked it out.
Meanwhile, Dr. Laura is railing against the American Librarians Association (or whatever it's called)
because children (according to Laura the panty dropper) are accessing bestiality sites at the library.
Now, I realize bartcop.com speaks frankly and
uses the language that most Americans use,
but I'm Mother Teresa compared to those bestiality sites. (BTW, why isn't that word spelled beastiality?
I had to look up the spelling and I'm a very busy man.)
So, if we look at the anecdotal facts presented, either
is worse than a bestaility site
or Laura the panty dropper is lying to make herself more money.
Gee, that's a tough one...
Patriotism Provides a Shield for Bush
by Joan Konner
Three media-related factors are converging to produce the gap-toothed smile of
self-satisfaction we now see on the screen. First, the ratings climb of Fox News,
a blatantly biased, conservative news service that is challenging the long-time
supremacy of the more balanced news networks. Fox News is gaining viewers
and, consequently, ground in the all-important revenue race.
Question: When Fox announces (every commercial) that they
are the ONLY news
source that's fair and balanced, why do the other networks take that like Democrats?
Fox News, like Joan Konner just said, is so amazingly blatant in their right-wing slant,
they should be laughed off the dial by everyone in the news business - but nooooooo.
The other networks just lay back and enjoy being tarred with being
biased for Clinton.
As Al Franken said in one of the best lines in years, "I guess CNN is biased for Clinton,
because they only ran stories about Monica Lewinsky 23 hours a day."
George W. Bush God’s President?
Do tax cuts for the wealthy represent the will of God?
by Smoking Joe Conason
The implications of all this are obviously profound. If the President is indeed guided
by Providence in lavishing additional billions upon those who already enjoy so much
material abundance—even while the numbers of unemployed, uninsured and homeless
soar—then his ascension may represent a millennial reversal of heavenly policy.
Way to fight the appointed frauds!
Maybe you and I can get adjoining cells while we await our secret execution.
Special thanks to Mark Taggart
Mark Taggart got a new computer for Christmas so he packed his
current computer in a box and shipped it to Christian's home - for free.
A second shot of Chinaco Anejo for Mark Taggart.
Wait a minute... Taggart, Taggart...
Wasn't he in Blazing Saddles?
Valentine's Day is just around the corner
That means chocolate.
Chocolate for her.
Chocolate means South's Finest Chocolate
Make your woman happy - get her the best chocolate in the world.
click to order
It's the Chinaco of fine, luxury chocolates.
While they last!
bartcop.com reader Kevin Alexander had a few hundred of these printed up and sent them to me.
They have an adhesive back, so they'll stick on stuff.
If you'd like some, send a self-addressed, stamped envelope to PO Box 54466, Tulsa, OK 74155
and I'll send you 5 or 10, whatever you need.
If you want to include a pittance to help grow the hammer higher - that's
but you can get stickers without a donation. After all, this is not the Catholic Church.
If you attach the sticker to a fun place and send me a picture I'll run it, but be responsible.
PayPal to email@example.com
POBox 54466.... Tulsa,OK 74155
Use the portal below and they'll throw bartcop.com a nickel and
it costs you nothing more than whatever you were going to pay.
Read the Previous Issue
It had everything.
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