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Volume 1000 - Quagmire

Please click on our sponsors

Monday    February 17, 2003 


''Iraq is a big threat? Baloney.''
  --Helen Thomas, Thursday night at Hobart and William Smith College

 BartCop on Meet the Whore

  Click  Here


"The party is split over this. There are only 180,000 members but more than
  one million people were in the park. The government no longer speaks for
  its constituency. If Blair takes us into the war we will launch a movement
  in the Labour party to indict him."
    --Prominent Labour anti-war MP Alan Simpson

 Being how this is the big anniversary issue, we tried to dig out some funny bits from the past.
 Most of these are from my dreaded "Blue period," where colorful language was often used.
 It may also have been my party days...

 There's this one old story someone suggested - back when Sears sent a clown to sue me.

 Click  Here  to read The Softer Side of Sears

 In the Kitchen with BartCop
  It's that fabulous Train Station Fried Chicken

  Click  Here


"If one were asked today whether Americans are better off now than they were four years ago,
  or even 25 months ago, the answer would certainly be an emphatic negative. In fact, I'll take
  the Carter recession and the Iranian hostage crisis over what life is like today....
  George W. Bush's father called the post-Cold War arrangement a "New World Order."
  I think I miss the Old World Order."
   --G. Jefferson Price III, Who will lead America out of the darkness?,

 We got accustomed to Clinton's Paradise
 and are having trouble acclamating to Bush's Hell


 I hear the conservatives whining that if an actor "comes out" and admits he's a Bush supporter or a
 conservative, they can't get work.  Horseshit!  Is there even one example of this fraudulent theory?

Are there any decent republican actors?

Charlton Heston - can't act, never could
Major Dad - can't act, never could
Shannen Doughtery  - can't act, never could
Bo Derek  - can't act, never could
Mel Gibson  - can't act, never could
Arnold  - can't act, never could
Red-Ink Reagan   - can't act, never could
Ben Stein  - can't act, never could
Ted Nugent  - if he could act, he couldn't act
Billy Jack  - can't act, never could
John Wayne  - can't act, never could
J. J. Walker  - can't act, never could
Bruce Willis  - can't act, never could
Clint Eastwood  - can't act, never could

(Well, those last two can play a squinty-eyed loner, but can they act?)

Who are the actors who are getting blackballed?
Who are the "talented" Republicans who can't get work?

I'll tell you what it is:  Republican actors have no range or emotions because they have no heart.
If they could put themselves in someone else's shoes, they'd be Democrats.
Republicans have no place telling stories.

They don't know what it's like to be human.

 The Doctor Laura Hustler pictures

  Click  Here

 Must be 18 - she's a very vulgar woman


 A shout out to my good friend Ben Affleck for having the #1 movie.
 It brought in a whopping $43M over the weekend.

Jenna made the cover of Girls Gone Wild


"We should not forget about those who finance terrorism.
  We should not forget about that."
    - Bad Vlad Putin. noting that 15 of the September 11th terrorists were Saudi citizens

"I don't feel like I owe anybody an explanation. I'm the President of the United States." -
   -- Appointed, never-elected spoiled little boy in an interview on "60 Minutes".

"You know why conservatives love the Saudi government?
  Because it stands for everything THEY stand for.
  It oppresses women, it forces religion down people's throats,  and it loves money
  above anything else.  Those are the 3 fundamentals of conservatism."
     - James Carville, breathing fire on the guilty

 The Titanic Oil Disaster

  Click  Here

From Lee in Seattle


"It's a little bit like crying wolf. You know, it hasn't happened yet.
  Constant news alerts on TV about terror are frightening people."
      -- Pickles Bush, married to a moron

 Poker at Al's  with the long-lost fourth chapter
 Like Ad Ames and his tomahawk

  Click  Here

 Subject:  that Bill of Rights debate from the other day...

 Bartcop -

 Ok, I read what you said. But my question was, 'how many rights have YOU PERSONALLY LOST?
 See, you are pointing out instances where our gov't has detained and effectively 'locked away' some
 combatants from Al Qeida.

 No, Bush has the law behind him if and when he decides ANYBODY needs to be detained for
 life or simply executed. Why do you think that's no big thing? Because you personally like Bush?

 I personally have no problem with this.

 Well sure, there's no problem if you look at the facts "funny."
 Each time I say "suspect," you think "convicted terrorist."
 We all want to personally dismember the guilty.

 Now, lets take a look back to a time when your buddy Clinton was running things.
 We have the U.S. Marshals and FBI on a feeding frenzy up in Idaho, where they killed
 a mans wife and son during a shootout over some B.S. weapons regulation.

 Hold on - he was charged with selling sawed-off shotguns.
 Is that really a BS regulation?

 And oh gosh, you stepped in it - BIG time.
 Can I get you a tree branch to scrape that stuff off your shoe?

 Rush has said 1,000 times that Clinton had Randy Weaver killed,
 but that was the summer of 1992 - proving Bush ordered that hit on Weaver.

 Then not 6 months later, they do a similarly stupid thing in Waco, Texas.
 All this was happening while "big dog" was supposedly paying attention and running the country.

 Again, sorry they lied to you about Clinton killing Weaver - it was Bush.
 I don't know a lot about Waco, but I can guarantee that Reno and Clinton didn't "cook those kids,"
 the way the money-grubbing whores like Rush, Hannity, Liddy etc promised every day for years.

 You really think Clinton helped coordinate that Waco raid?
 Or was it more likely the Reagan/Bush people after 12 years of entrenchment?

 So as you can see, stupidity is not limited to the Republican party.
 Your Democratic leaders can be just as stupid, if not more so.
 This is what happens when people who have no business running things have control.

 What is what happens?
 That Bush murdered Weaver and the Reagan/Bush FBI hit Waco?

 Half of the problems we currently face are a direct result of some "deal" made during Clintons
 time in office. (I.E. the N. Korea power plant debacle) I agree with some of your thoughts,
 but I think you need to see the other side too..

 B Carrigan

 I can tell you own an AM radio.
 The way I see the North Korean situation is this: Clinton made them a deal and everyone was happy
 with peace and prosperity and then Bush started screaming "Axis of evil" at North Korea.
 They know of his fondness for killing things and started looking to play some defense.
 This almost-elected president needs to learn to control his tongue

 The Day the Dunkin Donut Man Died

  Click  Here

 Subject: going to hell

 you're langage is a dead giveaway of your ignorants clinton is
 a liar and and cheet the only thing he is going for him is good
 looks there is such a thing as abstaining from sex but I guess
 a liberall like you with no morale standards would not entertane
 such a a thing whtsa wrong with you

 yours truly,
 Melanie Jones

 Melanie, seriously...
 How long since you got any?

No matter how low FOX puts the numbers
a lot of people were in the streets Saturday


"The Gambino crime family is now falling apart, with Gotti gone.
  So now, the biggest crime organization in New York is the Catholic Church."
    --  Dave

 TV is whack tonight

 ABC is all Jacko all night.
 NBC is only 2/3 all Jacko all night, with a Fear Factor thrown in.
 FOX is all Jow Millionaire all night.

 Meanwhile, CBS look like a television network with various shows at various times,
 including the long-awaited Dr Phil appearance on The Late Show with Dave.

 Dave's called him everything from a "quack" to a "hump."

 Meanwhile, The History Channel's doing "Hitler's Henchmen."
 I wonder if Prescott Bush will be featured?

 The Madness of King George the W.

  Click  Here

 What has caused this dramatic change in the President's character? And don't say,
 "political opportunism." That's just cynical. It's too easy to blame the President's
 Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde act on the shrewd maneuverings of Karl Rove. If we accept
 that George's dramatic, one might say, operatic change from Mr. Compassion to
 Dr. Death is one of calculated lies, cynical deception and political bait 'n switch,
 then we have to admit that Americans are stupid, naïve, brainless nincompoops
 who have no business running a democracy.

Dear Bartcop,

Here's one thousand pennies for 1000 issues!  Thanks for all you do!
You've helped keep me sane for the last three years; exposing the BFEE
and their thug minions for the totalitarian globe-grabbing criminals they are,
and making me laugh at the same time!

Now, more than ever, we need BARTCOP radio!
Keep raising the hammer higher, Bart, then bring it on down.


 Liberal Radio Is Planned by Democrats

  Click  Here

 A group of wealthy Democratic donors is planning to start a liberal radio network to
 counterbalance the conservative tenor of radio programs like "The Rush Limbaugh Show."

 The group, led by Sheldon and Anita Drobny, venture capitalists from Chicago who have
 been major campaign donors for Bill Clinton and Al Gore, is in talks with Al Franken,
 the comedian and author of "Rush Limbaugh Is a Big Fat Idiot." It hopes to enlist other
 well-known entertainers with a liberal point of view for a 14-hour, daily slate of commercial
 programs that would heavily rely on comedy and political satire.

 The Rest of the Story

  Click  Here

Thanks to

 Congrats on 1000

 Keep growing the hammer, Bart.  And hey, even here in Raleigh NC at the Capitol Bldg.
 there were 7 to 8 THOUSAND at the anti-war protest.  This was the number used by the media too.
 Tells you something about the groundswell again the Moron and his bogus 'war.'

 Keep hammering away, man!


 If homosexuality is NOT genetic,
 if it's "learned," please someone explain:

1. Why does Snoot Gingrich have a gay sister?
     If she "learned" homosexuality, did Snoot?

2. Why does Sonny Bono have a gay daughter?
     Sonny taught her to be gay?

3. Why does Phyllis Schaffly have a gay son?
     Did Phyllis the Shaft "teach" him to be gay?

4. Why do Ron and Nancy have a gay son?
     (Or is he a straight ballerina?)

Why do they claim homosexuality is "learned,"
 if many famous Republican families have gay children?

 Remember our State of the Union sign contest?

 Click  Here

 We have sent out only one prize, to Allen in Huston.
 I still need addresses for Cynthia and Ollie.


"The important question is: How many hands have I shaked?"
     -- Too stupid to believe

"President's Day Sale: Bill of Rights going fast."  --slogan on a sign at the N.Y. protest

Marty's E! page
Baron Dave Romm
Poets protest
Beware of
MTV has gone propaganda
California Japanese-American congressman Mike Honda
(who was interned with his family), is pressing for action regarding
Rep. Howard Coble (R-racist) and his desire for new internment camps
A review of Ron Jeremy's 'Porn Star'
The First Vienna Vegetable Orchestra
Dolores Hope with Nancy Reagan



"So let everyone recognise what has happened here today, that Britain does not
  support this war for oil. The British people will not tolerate being used to prop up
  the most corrupt and racist American administration in over 80 years.
  This is a man who has sent his own soldiers to die but who got his daddy to
  get him out of national service. Where I come from we call that cowardice."  "
     --Ken Livingstone, London mayor, London protest, 02/15/03

 We call it a rich boy going AWOL and the other troops forgiving him.

 Help make BartCop Radio a now thing, rather than a someday thing.

 Is  worth $5 a month?

 Is  Bartcop Radio  worth $10 a month?

  Thanks to Bruce Yurgil

 They own the TV networks, the major papers and talk radio.
 The Internet Resistance is all we have.

 Click  Here   to get BartCop Radio sooner rather than later

 Unrattled Rice. Duh?

  Click  Here

"Vivid memories of terrified, wild-eyed, out-of-control and badly-led
  teenage National Guardsmen opening fire and indiscriminately killing
  their own unarmed U.S. college brothers and sisters."


"Tyrants don't respond to any kind of appeasement.
  Tyrants don't respond to negotiation.
  Tyrants do respond to toughness.
  The world needs to pull itself together and send a very strong message to the Iraqis."
    -- George's little Condoleeza

 Hey Condi, are you sure you have the right tyrant?
 Maybe you were thinking about your employer.
 Seems to me the world gave its response to him already; perhaps you didn't hear it?


Bush gets even with California


"It is like an ad for Klan News."
  --an angry reader criticizing "The Nation" for accepting an ad from Fox News.

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 It had  everything.

 Copyright © 2003,

                                                       Shirley Manson of Garbage

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