Fair & balanced



Julie's Thanks

The Gambler

Leave it to BartCop

Let's Not Roll

Kiss My Ass

Cheney Leaving?

Ich bin ein Enroners

A Slut Named Laura

The Myth of the
Liberal Media

Julie's Rebuttal

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Volume 751 - No Lies Can Hide


Thursday   March 21, 2002           Send Me an Angel      Recent old stuff      Shopping w/ Bart


"I'm going to bring bin Laden to justice,
  or I'll bring justice to bin Laden, ...so help me God."
    -- President Dry Hole, alllll thru September and October.

 Whoops, that's not quite true.
 Bush never said "...so help me God," concerning bin Laden.

 He only says "...so help me God,"  when he really means it, like when
 he's talking about hueueueuege tax cuts for his super-rich campaign contributors.

 Getting bin Laden for raping New York isn't a Bush priority.
 For Bush, getting bin Laden is a sidebar.
 TAX CUTS for the super rich - THAT'S a Bush priority.

 When Bush is sincere about something, he either says "...so help me God,"
 or he says "...not over my dead body" or some mangled derivitive.
 When he lied about bin Laden, he was careful not to involve God's name
 because he didn't want to promise something he didn't have his heart in,
 like giving his super-rich billionaire friends a massive tax cut.

 I don't think he can stand having bin Laden caught.

 If that happened, people might start asking if we can have our goddamn Constitution back,
 and the Bush Family Evil Empire still hasn't finished raping the US Treasury.
 So bin Laden gets away so Bush can keep the country on constant "terra alert."

 ...and the Democrats are letting him get away with it.

 Planning for Martial Law?
   By Dave Lindorff at  Salon.com

  Click  Here

 Civil libertarians say the Bush administration may give the military
 scary new police powers in its secret planning for a bunker-based,
 post-disaster shadow government.

 Going somewhere?  ...like, ...maybe ...Washington DC on April 27th?
 Use this link and they'll send me a nickle.

 Top Ten Things Overheard at Juliefest 2002

  Click  Here

 From the New York Times...

 "The release of the Whitewater report means the main activity of the independent
   counsel's office is finished. Ray has resigned and is seeking the Republican nomination to
   run for the senate from New Jersey. The office will remain to deal with housekeeping items
   like requests for reimbursement for legal costs as required by the now-expired law."

  Gee, can we think of any innocent person who had to pay a million dollars in legal billls
  and lost her home in an attempt to escape this idiotic, partisan zipper hunt?

 Dueling Quotes

"Insufficient evidence exists that Governor or Mrs. Clinton knowingly participated
   in the criminal financial transactions used by McDougal to benefit Whitewater."
    -- Robert Ray, "independent" counsel running for the senate as a Republican.

"This report is the most expensive exoneration in history. Their investigation was unprecedented
   in its seven-year length, $70 million expense and unremitting intensity. But it ends as it began:
   with no evidence of any wrongdoing by the Clintons."
     -- David Kendall, Clinton's lawyer

 They knew Clinton was innocent all along, but they were jonesing to impeach him.
 Robert Fiske tried for years, but he couldn't find anything close to a crime,
 so they hired the religiously-insane tobacco lawyer - Kenneth Starr.
 He couldn't find any crimes, either, so he tried to quit and take a Scaife-funded job in Malibu.
 The right-wing screamed, "You can't quit until you find a crime to impeach Clinton for."

 At this point, the partisan Supreme Court stepped in and green-lighted every nonsense motion
 filed by Paula Jones's lawyers to help Starr fabricate a crime that could be used to impeach him.
 They were always going to impeach Clinton - always.

 Starr never could find a crime, so he left and said, "Good luck" to Robert Ray.
 Robert Ray couldn't find any crimes, so he's released this pitiful excuse of a report.

 And if this is all just one, big game, why did Julie Hiatt Steele have to lose her home?

  From the sincere folks at foxnews.com
 Online Rants Not Always Free Speech

  Click  Here

 Clinton haters are obsessive, weird
    by Dave Zweifel at The Capitol Times Opinion page

  Click  Here

"...there are a lot of people in this country who just can't sleep at night
  if the day has gone by without spewing some venom about Bill Clinton.
 And like the many stories that the independent counsel pursued through
 all those years, most of that venom is pure garbage.

 There are those who simply cannot bring themselves to admit that other
 than the sex scandal, Bill Clinton's two terms as president were some
 of the best times in this nation's history.  And if they can't pin something
 else on him, they'll make it up."

 One of my favorites

  Click  Here  and turn up your speakers.

  It's the smallest sound clip you'll ever hear.

 There is lots and lots of entertaining stuff at
 Marty has Oscar Fever!!
  Check her site for details, but I believe she's giving away a pound
  of the best-tasting pure milk chocolate in the whole world.

  for the person who can most accurately predict the Oscar winners.

 Since likely more than one person will win, maybe she'll devise
 a tie-breaker, like what time the credits roll when the broadcast is over.

 Don't miss out!
 Marty's E! page is the best, and so's the chocolate


"I think the Democratic Party has the chronic problem of appearing to be weak, of not standing
 and fighting for what it believes in, not fighting for its own. I think that America will not trust a party
 to defend America that isn't willing to defend itself. And that's basically my message. The Republicans
 are hard-hitting, ruthless, and we don't have to do everything they do, but we ought to be just as willing
 to stand up for what's right as they're willing to stand up for what is wrong... Democrats in Washington
 are completely mortified that somebody's gonna say something bad about them at a dinner party in
 Cleveland Park on a Saturday night. You tell them there's an Op-Ed piece coming out, with somebody
 saying they're being divisive, and they'll fall apart."
   -- James Carvile

 Y'know, ...to write a daily opinion column on the Internet,
 ...one must has a massive ego, ...and I plead guilty to that.

 But don't you just know that James and I could sit in a bar somewhere and
 trade shots and fix the Democratic party and make them a contender again?

 Carville is miles above me in brains, experience and cunning,  but dammit, I got some FIGHT in me,
 and the sissyfied, gelding Democrats NEED people like me to rally the troops who've given up
 and chose to worship the pitifully stupid Bush boy.  What's wrong with our party?

 We have to stop thinking about the future and concentrate on the goddamn present.
 We have to stop being so damn worried about what bogus charge some ditto-monkey
 might throw at us and just do the right damn thing and oppose the B.F.E.E.

 Remember a pillar of  bartcop-ism:
 The strong take from the weak, and the smart take from the strong.
 That won't ever change. It's human nature.

 Today's Democratic party is weak AND stupid.
 We're so weak and stupid, we're being swamped by President Weak & Stupid.

 I need to connect with James Carville.
 If YOU can get to James Carville, connect us.
 I'm going to put Ken Starr and Robert Ray in prison.

  Hold up on that ransom money...
 Isaac Peterson has returned!


 An Evening with Julie Hiatt Steele
 >>> April 27th <<<in Washington D.C.

 Click  HereNew totals - important updates

 Write to Julie at   PO Box 1351, Virginia Beach, VA 23451

 E-mail to Julie, use juliehiattsteele@bartcop.com

 PayPal to Julie, Click  Here  ->

 If you send me anything send your phone number
 Send Juliefest inquires/confirmations to  Juliefest2002@yahoo.com

 Let's party with Julie like it's 2099.

 ...Senator Steele

 I like the sound of that.
 I can't wait to meet her.

 37 days from today.


 "My opponent has a .22 caliber brain in a .457 world."
    -- President Bartlet, taunting his extremely stupid Republican
        opponent in an upcoming episode of West Wing

We've almost got our West Coast Sweep for Juliefest

Larry Tooth from San Diego might come.
We're trying to convince BartCop E!'s Marty in Los Angeles to fly in.
Marc Perkel (D-Framed) from San Francisco is coming.
Perkel defensive coordinator Michele the BartCook is coming from Portland.

Anyone coming from Seattle?  Yes!

Julie RB is from Seattle!

You East Coasters better not let the West Coasters make you look puny.

If would be a shame if the West Coast made it, but the Philly, New York,
Baltimore, PittsburgH, Newark, Buffalo, Norfolk, Cincinnati etc. people
said they couldn't come because it was "too far."

You can still get in for a mere $50, ...but tick tock...

 Don't forget to check 

 How's your basketball team doing?

Al Martin Replies to Brad
(See the third story in Volume 749 - Our Dire Situation )

Al Martin replies:

God save us from the Star Trek Generation.

To Young Mr. Brad -

   As a middle aged fellow with an advanced degree in history, let me remind you that the word "obsidian"
has been used extensively in religious and military orders, symbolic of strength and fidelity.

   Because of its strength, obsidian has signified the most elite of the elite military orders.
Obsidian, after all, is petrified anthracite which is well-known for its hardness.

   Where does Young Mr. Brad think that the writers of Star Trek got this concept?
They just made it up out of thin air? No, there is historical precedent in Ancient Rome
-- and that is why it is so significant in contemporary America and the new Bushonian Imperial Age.

   Regarding Moh's, the chart originally, in the 19th century, signified hardness as well as color.

 Southwest Airlines is doing their "friends fly free" program, and they fly to Baltimore,
 so that means airfare has dropped in half if you're trying to get to Juliefest 2002!

 Other airlines are matching SWA, so check into it, OK?
 You've never met anybody like Julie Hiatt Steele before.

    How about a hemp t-shirt that pricks our Failure in Thief?

                                                  click   to  order   Buy 3, get free shipping

 Hi, I'm Robert Ray and I'm going to prison along with Ken Starr.
 You see, we lied and lied about Kathleen Willey being credible,
 and when I released the final report, I clearly stated that we were
 unable to rely on her testimony because she kept lying.

 So why did we terrorize Julie Hiatt Steele for four years?
 Why did we have our goons call her sister and threaten her?
 Why did we look into little Adam's adoption?

 Part of it is because we're partisan bastards who hate Bill Clinton
 and Julie got in the way of our destroy-Clinton project, so we had to
 scare her into playing ball but dammit, ...she just wouldn't scare.
 So now we've been caught obstructing justice and tampering with
 witnesses and suborning perjury and we're totally screwed.

 Bart's going to do this to me and I can't blame him.
 I'm a guilty son of a bitch and I belong in prison.
 Please God, don't let him use the BartCop chainsaw on me."


 Only two days left to get Juliefest2002 tickets for just $50
 If your snail mail is postmarked the 20th, that'll be OK.

 C'mon, meeting Julie is worth more like $200.
 Paying $100 is a bargain, paying $75 is a steal.
 so paying just $50 is downright ridiculous.

From: Joe

Only one question:  I assume all of the "tiers" get to meet you, right?


Joe, when you meet me, it's you who will be all tears.
Self-important, low IQ blowhards are a dime a dozen.
In Washington DC, there are fifty of them on every corner.
But heroes like Julie Hiatt Steele are fewer than one in a million.

You are going to be damn impressed when you meet her.
Not only have you never met anyone like her,
you likely won't ever meet someone like her again.

You won't ever forget meeting Julie Hiatt Steele.
She will be outgoing, vivacious and sparkly.
I will be the opposite.
I'll be cringing and watching the clock.

You know what else?
I'll tell you what my mail will say when this is over.
"Bart, you were right on the money about Julie.
  She was exactly like you described her, even more so.
  It was a thrill to meet and speak to her, she's incredible.
  Thanks for giving me that opportunity."

Trust me.

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