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all Bill Clinton's fault
by Gene Lyons
Not to put to fine a point upon it, but this is a barefaced lie. Or would be if you didn't suspect that
Bush's overweening sense of entitlement is such that he honestly can't recall which of Daddy's friends
bought him what when.
With its online advantage, the mediawhoresonline.com
website began correcting the record on Friday.
By Saturday, the Dallas Morning News and Houston Chronicle weighed in. Then Salon. True, Lay did
donate $12,500 to Ann Richards' campaign in 1994. Except that he, his wife, and Enron execs gave Bush
more than $146,000. Last year, Lay told PBS's "Frontline" that he supported Bush in 1994, unanimously
confirmed by Texas political operatives.
"One would like to hear from President Bush,
regarding Enron's executives, the sort of anger
he expressed over the possibility that the crybaby Secret Service agent whose behavior caused
an American Airlines pilot to bar him from a flight might have been a victim of illegitimate profiling.
Instead, we have heard Bush's slippery
-- Clintonian, actually -- assertion that Enron's CEO,
Ken Lay, 'was a supporter of Ann Richards in my run in 1994' for governor. Well, yes, but no.
Lay contributed to Richards. And he contributed much more to Bush."
-- George Will, yes, the smarmy George Will has finally gotten one right.
Good God, who ever thought they'd live to hear George Will say something true?
Kmart's Board Meets, Bankruptcy an Option
Kmart Corp. board of directors met on Tuesday to discuss financial options,
possibly even bankruptcy, as the stock of the discount retailer again fell sharply today.
During the Clinton Miracle, Kmart stock
broke the $20 barrier.
Within a year of the Failure in Thief driving the boat, their stock is less than $2.50
Kmart isn't the only one.
Rating agencies see more pain for retailers
"We lowered an awful a lot of ratings in 2001, and I would expect
that we will have more downgrades than upgrades this year as well,''
says Jerry Hirschberg, director of Standard & Poor's corporate credit ratings.
Just like his daddy, he drags us into war
but the Bush Family Evil Empire is poised to make billions from it.
Remember what Al Gore said:
"Prosperity itself is on the ballot in November."
...but Scalia had other plans for America's future.
Subject: yesterday's "A slut named Laura"
While I was reading your story of the woman who
called the panty dropper for help,
I couldn't help thinking that if you substituted politics in place of playing in a band,
you would be telling the Bush story.
If I recall the stories they were telling on the
campaign trail right, Laura didn't want Georgie
to get back into politics. The twins didn't either. Georgie convinced them that he felt like he needed to.
Do you think that panty dropping Laura would give
the same kind of advice to Laura Bush?
For President Monkey in a Man Suit, first comes the Evil Empire, then Enron,
then the GOP, then his wife and children if there's any left to go around.
"Zell Miller (D-it figures) praised President
Bush's war-time performance as "magnificent"
and declared Clinton's reaction to a 1998 attack on U.S. embassies in Africa by Muslim
terrorists as "wimpy. The only response we made was firing a few missiles on an empty
terrorist camp. It was a wimpy response so totally inadequate I was ashamed."
-- Atlanta Journal Constitution, January 15, 2002
Excuse me, Senator, but I have a question: Could
you list for me the "magnificent" response
President Bush took against terrorism before September 11th?
You're very proud of a unelected oil man who did nothing but strong-arm
The Taliban for a pipeline,
and that seems to have been the primary catalyst for the September 11th attacks.
Media Whores Online continues to lead the way.
They are more reliable and more honest than any dead trees newspaper.
MWO's The Annals of Enron
If anybody at Andersen is in hot water over the Enron affair, it would appear to be Goddard.
Presumably, he worked closely with Enron and Kenneth Lay.
Goddard is also (surprise!) a key financial
backer of George W. Bush, one of the elite group of "Pioneers"
(along with his and Bush's good friend, "Kenny Boy" Lay) who raised $100,000 or more for the Bush 2000
And not just that. According to records
obtained by Texans for Public Justice, Goddard contributed over
$250,000 in soft money contributions from his employer, the vast bulk of it ($238,908) going to Republicans.
Did Goddard in any way facilitate the destruction
of Arthur Andersen files in connection with Enron?
If so, whom or what was he attempting to shield from investigators?
If not, how can he explain what happened on his watch?
And why, everywhere you look, is practically
everyone caught up in the Enron scandal also a big Bush supporter?
The Bush Family Evil Empire is so rich and so corrupt,
they can say,
"Here's $50 million, you're taking the blame for all this."
After nine years of chasing Clinton's cock over imaginary crimes,
we see a real-life missing billion dollars and Ari Fliesher warns us to "Watch what we say,"
and "Make this a political issue at your own risk?"
Of course, the toady press and the quaking boots Democrats will
follow their marching orders.
Bush will skate - again - he always does.
to Lay: What Was Your Name Again?
by Robert Scheer
In March 1993, Enron hired Bush's Commerce secretary, Robert A. Mosbacher, and James A. Baker III,
to line up contracts for Enron around the world. As Enron's representative, Baker even went on a trip
accompanying the ex-president to Kuwait to do big business in the nation Bush had fought the Gulf War to save.
The trip was criticized by Gen. Norman Schwarzkopf,
who said that he had turned down millions in proffered
deals to do business in Kuwait after the war.
"I represent 540,000 American men and women, not
some private company," said Schwarzkopf.
"They were willing to die in Kuwait. Why should I profit from their sacrifice?"
But Norm, that how the Bush Family Evil Empire does business.
They break laws to get into power, then they drag America into
a war where the rules change and secrecy
becomes the patriotic duty of everyone. Then the Bush Family Evil Empire gets richer than hell.
...and the press and the lobotomy Democrats cheerfully go along for the ride.
A Second Winner
From: Jake Parson
I posted the answer back on January 10 in the Forum as you requested:
Jake, sorry, but can only have one winner per contest - - kidding!
I failed to monitor the posting forum as closely as I should have.
...so you are also a winner!
You may even have been first, but that other guy already picked
the Aerosmith CD,
so you can choose from the Garbage, the Dylan or the Janet Jackson AND you get your choco!!!
Send me your street address (they can't ship to a PO box) and
which CD you want.
Congrats, and thanks for finding that.
...what a place!
You get your news, your news analysis, your rock 'n roll, daily birthday salutes,
the best chocolate in the world, fine tequila research ...and it's all free!
"I am the Central Scrutinizer
What kind of illegal Ponzi scheme you running here, Funnyboy?
I think we need to look into you and your "free" dot.com, Funnyboy."
Hey, Mr. Asswipe, why don't you go arrest somebody at Enron?
Nudity on bartcop.com
"A little bit sexy..."
-- CNN's Candy Crowley describing herself to the Best Practices in Journalism
political reporting conference in Orlando Friday night
Uh, ...excuse me, Candy, but you're not a "little" anything.
by Isaac Peterson
Dear Attorney General Ashcroft,
I never thought I would be writing to you, but as you've said, these are unusual times.
I've wanted to talk to you, but you haven't
been very good about returning my calls,
so I'm writing you this letter. I hope you can make the time to read it.
I know how busy you are, what with rewriting the Constitution and all.
Subject: rug burns
If you ask me, that ain't no bruise, it's a severe
Where was Mr. Rove on Sunday evening while Pickles was in the other room?
Where was Rush?
Where was Attorney General John 'Annoint-me-with-Crisco' Ashcroft?
I have a picture of a Georgie Boy where his friend bin Laden, is
...following too close.
I'll bet you've seen it, too. I don't run it, tho, because we don't do the gratutitous nudity thing
here at bartcop.com ...but it would explain that rug burn.
breaking 50,000 hits.
That happens when you put pictures of Angie Harmon on your site.
Subject: WTC Memorial controversy
I think that the memorial doesn't necessarily
have to accurately represent the guys who raised the flag
because it isn't their memorial. The memorial is for the firefighters who died and representing them is
more important than matching the picture.
Please withhold address, I have enough stalkers.
Alex, I'm OK with that, but they need to pick a different moment or
Changing history at the sacrifice of accuracy seems pointless.
In Afghanistan… The Sequel
by Al Martin
You may have heard about the new US campaign in Afghanistan -- dropping propaganda canisters
full of propaganda leaflets. They're supposed to be WANTED posters for Osama bin Laden,
written in the local dialect. It's supposed to be a picture of him with a caption that says,
"Have you seen this man?"
The picture, though, is a doctored photo
showing him, clean-shaven and dressed in a Western-style
business suit. The Afghani peasants are having a hell of a time with these leaflets because every time
they see an American soldier, they laugh, they point to the picture and they say,
"Oh no, we haven't seen any clean shaven Arabs dressed in JC Penney business suits
that look like this, wandering around the hinterlands of Afghanistan - but we're still looking."
If anybody is interested in making
contact John Cole (not me) and we'll see what happens
Right after the Super Bowl we'll have the Olympics.
Right after the Olympics, we have March Madness,
which I don't care about, but I know some people do...
Wisconsin Priest Accused Of Handcuffing, Touching Teen
This is the last one of these I'll run for a while, unless something
really crazy happens.
If I run every story I see about a "touching priest," there'd be no room for GOP ridicule.
The Enron felons cash out
Betty Bowers's great work at
Plus, she's knocking 'em dead on her regular bettybowers.com site
"I tried to keep those unsaved Catholics outside the door as long as I could," said Mrs. Betty Bowers.
"Fortunately, I happened to have a slew of Chick Bible tracts in my Bottega Veneta clutch. I pulled out
one that seemed particularly well-suited for the audience called "Mary: Goddess of the Catholic Damned"
and started reading it to them, taking time to show each of them the cartoons of the priests being
righteously jammed up the rear with pitchforks..."
"Two years ago today I underwent quintuple
bypass heart surgery.
Today I am running as smooth as an Enron document shredder."
"I am the Central Scrutinizer.
Open a file on this ...David Letterman.
This guy must be new - I never heard of him.
Probably a friend of Funnyboy's and that Chop Suey guy."
analysis of Pretzelgate
This is the best take I've seen so far...
you gotta Click Here
Happy Birthday to...
Caroline Munro is 52 Kate Moss is 28
Also born today: Aaliyah (1979) Roy Jones, Jr. (1969) Guitarzan
and a shot of Chinaco for Maxine Waters, one of the few fighters the Democrats have.
Thanks to Dave at AMPOL
What the difference between Monica and President Stupid?
Monica refused to swallow.
Bush wanted to, but he couldn't even get that right.
Thanks to Rick in Indiana
Not the BartCop Hex!!
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Use the portal below and they'll throw bartcop.com a nickel and
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It had everything.
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