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Julie's Thanks

The Gambler

Leave it to BartCop

Let's Not Roll

Kiss My Ass

Cheney Leaving?

Ich bin ein Enroners

A Slut Named Laura

The Myth of the
Liberal Media

Julie's Rebuttal

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Volume 766 - In Urgent Need of Gravity 


Friday   April 5, 2002            Send Me an Angel               Recent old stuff              Shopping w/ Bart


"We can't ask the people in the Middle East to make peace on our timetable.
  They need to make peace on their timetable, not ours."
   -- Governor Bush, last year, when asked why he was so disengaged.

 Hey, Moron!
 "Their" timetable for peace has been a constant war for 2500 years.

 And while the Middle East was smoldering and bin Laden was training pilots,
 your crooked ass was in Crawford, Texas talking to the damn cows, remember?

 President Game Boy may be the worst president of the last 20,
 But I'll bet he has the Texas record for high score on Frogger.

Crossfire snippet

 Begala: I love polling. And I'm glad that Bush is polling. Maybe he'll learn that some
               of his idiot policies are unpopular with the country. But he shouldn't lie about it.
               He ought not lie about. Does anyone respect Bush for lying about the polling?

 Cowboy Dubya Bungles Again
   by Gene Lyons

  Click  Here

 Be it recorded that as the West Bank erupted in chaos over Easter weekend,
 the Leader of the Free World played with his dogs. According to aides, President
 Bush also went jogging and worked around his ranch. That would be the symbolic
 Crawford, Texas spread Bush acquired in 1999, after a life previously notable for its
 indifference to the rustic arts.  Maybe it's rude to say so, but Cowboy Dubya don't ride.

Maybe that should be "Testing our stupidest..."

 Juliefest Update

 First, let me say that I realize my stewardship if this event has
 resembled the Boy King's bungling of the Middle East situation.

 First tickets were $50, then $75, then $200, then $100, then we're sold out,
 then we're not sold out - it's been a not easy situation to wrangle.
 (Thank Koresh for Christian's cool head and working brain.)

 ...but unlike The Unelected Idiot, we're actually showing positive results.

 No matter what happens, Julie will end up with a handsome chunk of change
 and that's thanks to your generosity and your loyalty in "stickin'" with a friend.

 Yes - we have more $100 tickets.

 As of right now (Friday-noon) only about 50 official tickets have been e-mailed.
 But most of you have seen your name and contribution on the list

 If you have paid for a ticket(s) and are not on the list - contact us now.
 We still intend to freeze the guest list on April 13, so contact us NOW if we owe you a ticket.

 Best way to do that is to send e-mail to  juliefest2002@yahoo.com  and it would be wise
 to put "You owe me a ticket" in the subject box - that will get our attention.

 Last thing - we're certain there can only be a few that have been overlooked,
 so if you want some Juliefest 2002-DC tickets you need to act fast.

Make payments with PayPal - it's fast, free and secure!
  PayPal your $100 per ticket to  bartcop@bartcop.com
  or snail mail checks/MOs (but do it today) to bartcop.com at PO Box 54466, Tulsa, OK 74155

  If you've been kicking yourself for missing this possibly once-in-a-lifetime event,
  stop kicking and get out your credit card and join the party.

  This is going to be hueueueueueueuege.

  There's no telling (read my lips) who you might meet.

  ...and I promise - you'll never forget meeting Julie Hiatt Steele - slayer of Kenneth Starr.


 "In some parts of the country if you say 'Let's go bare-backing' you might get slapped."
       -- The Truth Molester, Rush Limbaugh, second hour Thursday 4/4

 The vulgar Pigboy did a whole segment Thursday on "barebacking."

 Swear to Koresh, he acted like he didn't know what the term meant.
 He kept telling his sheep not to go off  "half cocked" on the subject,
 then he had to ask a staffer - twice - why he was laughing at him.

 ha ha
 Make him stop!

 Most amazingly, Andrew (Captain Bareback) Sullivan's name never came up!
 [If you haven't heard, HIV-infected, Clinton-hating, ultra-right-wing Sullivan
  was caught advertising for "bareback sex" in some magazine that I don't read.]
 Andrew Sullivan is the most famous bare-backer in the country, and I'm sure
 because he's the only bare-backer that I know of.

 I wonder how many young men Andrew Sullivan has infected by bare-backing?
 Butt, of course, Rush would never mention anything negative about a wild-ass Republican
 who was infecting others with his nasty-ass bare-backing because Sullivan has an "R" behind him.

Subject: Enron scandal Rope a Dope

The left is being taken for a ride by the Bushies again. In the past few weeks so many of us
on the left have been cheering the demise of Andersen, and we have not bothered to ask why
the Justice Department is focusing all of its efforts on Anderson and not Enron.

Kenny Boy and his gang of thugs have the goods on Bush. If the Ashcroft Justice Department
were to issue indictments to the Enron gang, Kenny Boy would be the one saying ďLetís RollĒ.

President Bunny Pants canít afford to have his criminal acts exposed. If anyone form the Enron gang
is ever indicted, it will be at the end of Bunny Pantsí term and he will promptly issue those indicted
pardons to prevent us from finding out what the quid pro quo was.

Bush is trying to make Anderson the John Walker Lindh of the Enron scandal.
I donít what is worse - Bush doing this or the fact that we are all falling for it.


Mark, I'm doing what I can, but the hammer is small.
As long as Bush owns the press and the Democrats are too scared,
there's not a lot we can do until the hammer gets more power behind it.

I wonder if there will be any "angels" in DC on April 27th?


 "My administration has been calling upon all the leaders in the Middle East
   to do everything they can to stop the violence, to tell the different parties involved
   that peace will never happen."

    -- President Monkey in a Man Suit, Crawford, Texas, Aug. 13, 2001

  Oh, God, what did we do to deserve this idiot Emporer?

 Law firm Kirkland & Ellis drawn into Enron probe
  Ken Starr's law firm had ties to crooked Bush partner Enron
     by The Whore Street Journal

  Click  Here

 But it could be a while before investigators get Kirkland & Ellisís files.
 The firm is being cautious about complying with document requests.

 Oh, sure - when it was Clinton's private sex life, "The people have a right to know."
 But now that the BFEE and Enron and Kenneth Starr get caught stealing
 hundreds of millions from the little people, we need to mind our own business?

 ...of course, the press and the Democrats will let them skate away - again.

 I'm so old, I remember when America had a two-party system.



 "C'mon now, ...enough is enough,"
   -- President Extremely Stupid, trying to stop the suicide bombings.

 James Carville: Retroactively impeach Clinton ifÖ

  Click  Here

 James Carville invoked Bill Clinton's name in the latest effort to get political traction
 in attacking the Bush administration for its ties to the now bankrupt Enron Corporation.

 Citing events for which there is no evidence, Carville said,
"If the Clinton administration allowed Enron to appoint the head of the committee
  that regulated them, then I say that Bill Clinton ought to be retroactively impeached."

 There's always something good at 

 "I felt extremely used by the Bush administration"

 Click  Here

 Hey, Oprah's looking pretty good!

 Kathleen Willey gets talk show in Richmond 

  Click  Here

  I was able to reach Ms. Steele for a comment.

  She had none.

 London Reports Ozzy invited to meet The Chimp

  Click  Here

  Question:  Who has the sharper mind, Ozzy or President Is-our-children-learning?

"Mr. President, it's so f*ing nice to meet you and your f*ing wife.
  I thought I'd be a f*ing wanted poster on the f*ing wall,
  not invited to your place for f*ing tea.  Where is the f*ing loo?"

 If there was a God, C-Span would cover this live.

 When liars lie

 Mr Bush criticised the Palestinian leader, Yasser Arafat, saying:
 "The situation in which he finds himself today is largely of his own making.
   He has missed his opportunities and thereby betrayed the hopes of his people."

 Hmmmm.. sounds like he's talking about the 2000 Clinton/Camp David Accords
 that the B.F.E.E. scuttled by warning Barak not to sign that agreement and then Ariel Sharon,
 with the blessing of the B.F.E.E., thought it would be the best best tim to tour the (I need a staff)
 and that started this whole wave of violence and the evil Bush crime family is too blame..

 Stop lying, Governor Bush!

 Remember how many times they told us in campaign 2000
 that it wasn't important to have a president who could think?

 But now the Middle East is exploding, and the clueless stooge
 is finding out that hiding in Crawford, talking to the cows and
 playing video games is NOT what America needs right now.

 I wish we had a president who was elected - not appointed.
 I wish we had a president America could trust in a crisis.
 I wish we had Bill Clinton.

Russia Alerted U.S. About Robert Hanssen's Spying

  Click  Here

 An impending report on FBI security prompted by the Robert Hanssen spy case
 says Moscow first alerted U.S. officials about the former FBI agent's activities
 eight years before he was arrested, the Washington Post reported on Thursday.

 Notice how skillfully they phrased that sentence to give Saint Reagan and Poppy a pass?
 Hanssen was arrested by the Clinton administration, so if the White House was warned
 eight years before he was arrested, that means it was another Republican bungle,
 but, like they always do, the whore press covers for the Bush Family Evil Empire.

 Had the reverse been true, the headline would've read,
"Clinton let spy slip through"
    Ignored warnings from Russians

 Why can't they just give the date that Russia warned us?
 Why can't they just give us the facts?

 Why does the Bush Family Evil Empire alway get a pass?

 Followup to yesterday's followup of
 Wednesday's Prescott Bush/China connection:

 Subject: Prescott Bush

 I've sent you this link maybe a dozen times

 (I'm a low IQ chimp who really needs a staff :)


 Prescott Bush, Jr. is Chairman of
 the U.S.- China Chamber of Commerce.

 He presided over a *huge* technology transfer of electronics soon after
 his nephew suspended our right to duly elect our Chief Executive.


THIS is why Bush got on his knees and begged China to forgive our airmen.
 for flying near China's airspace (unless Bush was lying about that, too)

The Bush Family Evil Empire has BUSINESS, ...secret BUSINESS with communist China.
They don't care what the cost is in lives - they feel they have a right "to earn."

 ...and I'm going to get away with it!

Democrats - where the hell are you?
Why do you cash your pay check every week if you're not working?

 With President Oil and VP Oil, our national parks are in severe trouble.
 Bush would sacrifice Yellowstone in a heartbeat if his oil-greedy crime family
 could make fifty dollars by getting in there with their leaky drilling rigs.

"Please Mr Bush, don't kill me."

 Jeb Bush is to Florida as Ken Lay is to Enron

   Click  Here

 Just as Ken Lay hid Enron's fiscal mismanagement from employees and investors,
 it seems our governor will go to any lengths to mislead Floridians about how the
 state's economy has gone from surpluses to deficits on his watch.

 When Jeb Bush took the reigns of power nearly four years ago he spoke of lofty goals
 such as creating jobs, more efficient government and a world-class education system.
 Now, near the end of his term, we are back to deficit spending; our school system is
 at the bottom of the national pile and government graft has become of the order of the day.

 Jeb loots Florida while his simpleton brother loots the Social Security lockbox.
 This whole Bush Family Evil Empire is an epidemic out of control.

 I'll find little solace when America finally says,
"Bart, you were right all the time. If only we'd listened to you!"

 Repeal the USA Patriot Act
  Part III: Civil Rights Violations and Torture

  Click  Here

 If you want to get Julie Hiatt Steele going, ask her about the Patriot Act.
 When Herr Starr was running wild, ruining her life, it was because he had
 ABSOLUTE power and he could do any damn thing he wanted.

 Starr's unlimited powers superceded every right she thought she had, every law on
 the books in every state and every plank of the once-untouchable US Constitution.

 If I understand Julie's position, The Patriot Act turns EVERY American into another
 Julie Hiatt Steele, meaning the government can do anything they want and we're
 powerless to say, "What happened to my rights under the Constitution?"

 I mean, it wouldn't be so bad if the guy who suspended the Constitution had been
 elected by the people, but that evil Bush boy STOLE power with the help of his
 Daddy's crooked judges and then, ...f-ing then, he gets us into a permanant world war
 and asks Congress not to investigate how all this happened?

 And the Democrats in Congress sheepishly say "Yes Sir, ...sorry we brought it up?"

 I need a drink...

 Don't forget to check 

 Krugman's Behavior at Dinner irks Bush officials
  Liberal NYW Times columnist fails to bow to Boy King

  Click  Here

 The White House source also said when Bush received a standing ovation following his remarks,
 Krugman refused to stand or applaud.

"This is the thought police," said Krugman. "Next, they'll say there was
   something wrong with the expression on my face. This is ridiculous."

 ...sounds like somebody failed to give The Governor "Harrumph!"

 Watch your ass, Krugman.

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