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A Slut Named Laura

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Volume 840 - God is never wrong

Anti-Ann Coulter site

 Friday    July 12, 2002 


"The good Lord didn’t see fit to always put oil and gas
   resources where there are democratic governments."
     -- Vice President Oil, explaining why it's OK to invade other countries,
         kill their leaders and force American religion on them at gunpoint.

 House GOP Already Failed on Corporate Responsibility

 On July 9, 2002, President Bush went to Wall Street to call for  several specific reforms
 in response to the recent corporate responsibility scandals. However, many of his plans
 have already been proposed by Democrats in Congress - and shot down by Bush's fellow
 Republicans. The following is a list of reforms that the House Republicans have already rejected.

 Click  Here

 Cheney's Skeletons
 Click  Here

 When George W Bush fingered 59-year-old Dick Cheney as his Vice-Presidential running mate,
 America’s right-wing pundits erupted in praise. They pointed to the Nebraska-born Cheney’s
 government experience as White House chief of staff and Secretary of Defense. They hailed his
 ‘cool-headedness’, moral rectitude and success as a no-nonsense frontperson for Big Oil. Time
 magazine even described Cheney as a ‘grey sheriff from some late-period Clint Eastwood western,
 riding out of retirement to drive off the rascals who’d plundered his town’.

 What the press barely mentioned were the skeletons in Sheriff Cheney’s closet. Now that he is
 second-in-command of the most powerful nation on earth these skeletons are worth dusting off –
 especially in the area of foreign policy where Cheney will wield great, if not definitive, influence in
 the Bush camp.

 Send me to the Senate
      by Julie Hiatt Steele

   Click  Here

  Bullies will forever rant, and rave, and bluster their way through
  the agenda du jour because it is tolerated, and because they know
  it will never be mentioned again. What impeachment?

 Subject: Robert Ballard Discovers Presidential War Relic

 Today, Dr. Robert Ballard, discoverer of the Titanic, announced he has discovered a Presidential War relic.

 "Through extensive research of Air Force Records, MP DUI Reports, and a still due $83,000 bar tab,
 we have discovered  George W. Bush's O-Club bar stool, on which he bravely sat on during his service
 in the Texas Air National Guard. Our research indicated Mr. Bush preferred to sit close to the men's room.
 After a search lasting up to ten minutes, we discovered the bar stool!"

 "We ran tests to verify our find, they all show traces of Cocaine, which we feel makes it proof positive
 that is indeed the Bar Stool in which George W. Bush Fought the Vietnam War on!"

 The President said today he was pleased and the announcement brought of fuzzy memories of the times
 he and his pink elephant friend "Sparky" sat at the bar discussing the deep Philosophical disciplines.

 The Stool will occupy a place of honor along side his Harken Stock Options in the George W. Bush
 Presidential Library, Reeducation Camp and GULAG, to be build in a secrete secure location.


 BartCop IS the Press
     by Dave S

   Click  Here

 The underlying complaint, and this comes from Limbaugh/Buchanan/Satan too, is really that
 The Press IS performing its function. It's not the job of The Press to beat drums for our pet causes,
 but we want them to do that anyway.

Subject: Bartfest

Hey Bart,
I'm still coming.
We are still putting the cost of the trip together, it keeps going up!
But I'm gonna be there if I have to peddle a damn tricycle from Houston to Las Vegas.

I've still got bruises from kicking myself for not going to Julifest.
I'm not buying tickets until I know who's coming with me.

Your big fan,
Rusty in Texass

 Memos: Bush knew of Harken's problems
     by Anthony York

   Click  Here

 Meanwhile, Bush and his Harken colleagues received a warning about selling
 based on insider information. On June15, 1990, one week before Bush's sale,
 Harken attorneys at the firm of Haynes and Boone sent a memo to Harken staffers
 with the subject line "Liability for Insider Trading and Short-Swing Profits."

 "If the insiders presently possess any material non-public information,
  a sale of any of their shares could be viewed critically," the memo states.

   by Peter Beinart

  Click  Here

 "If you're looking for someone who set the moral tone for the decade of the '90s, I don't think
 you have to look any further than the former president's behavior," explained House Ways and
 Means Chairman Bill Thomas on CNN late last month. "It's impossible to understand Enron,"
 editorialized The Wall Street Journal, "outside the moral climate in which it flourished ... the Clinton years,
 when we learned that `everybody does it.'" Or, as Steve Forbes put it recently, "If you want to look at the
 tone of the '90s, it started right at the top, at the White House, where the attitude was anything goes."


 "There are many humorous things in the world; among them
    the white man's notion that he is less savage than the other savages".
     --Mark Twain

Subject: the Bush abortion


Do you have the name of the child that George W. Bush molested
and then persuaded to get an abortion? Also, do you have the name
of the Hospital and the date of the incident?

Please help.  (and do NOT print my e-mail addy...EVER)

Sure, it's easy to remember - just go to

 I woke up in a sweat in the middle of the night.
 I realized I was headlining in Las Vegas and I don't even have an act.

 Dilemma: Not sure what to do...
 Do we move forward with the Party of the Year?
 Or do we bail and accept defeat?

 I decided to pray about it.
 I asked Him to send me a sign.
 Please, God, send me a sign - tell me what to do!

 Shall I lead my people into the desert?
 Shall we seek the promised land?
 Send me a sign, Oh, Lord!

 When I got done praying, it was all very clear to me.
 The first thing I saw when I opened my eyes this morning was the date.

 It was 7-11.
 What?  It can't be!
 Can it be?

 That's it!

 God wants us to go to Las Vegas and play craps!
  His will be done!

 Note: God is never wrong!

 Thank you, God, for helping me with that tough decision!

 So, the party is on.
 If we end up with 20 people ready to party, we'll take over the Pink Taco
 or rent a bus and go to Area 51 or whatever the hell we want to do.
 If 50-100 people want to party, we'll need a room, but rooms can be had.
 In Las Vegas, you can do anything if you whip out the plastic.

 The hastily-named BartFest won't have any speeches unless we snag
 some celebrities, which is another reason to move forward.  If we cancelled,
 I'd get a call the next day from Surprise Number One and that would kill me.
 Instead of speeches, maybe after a few shots I'll sing a few songs - just kidding.
 Maybe American Stranger would perform his hit song "Oil War" at the gig?

 There are already too many people committed to think about turning back.
 Remember, you're making your own hotel reservations.

  So it's Party of the Year at The Rio


 Reminder: Las Vegas is NOT Six Flags over Texas

 September 28th - tickets on sale!

 One thing for sure - the video of Vegas will be much different than the DC video.
 I figure if nothing else, I'll wait until everyone is loopy and then turn on the camera.
 That way I can blackmail everyone and then quit my job.

Things to do in Vegas

  1. Desert Demonstration Gardens
  2. Red Rock Canyon Vermillion Wonderland
  3. The Grand Canyon  More than a big whole
  4. The Mirage Volcano and White Tigers
  5. The Stratosphere Tower and it's mile-high roller coaster
  6. New York, New York  The greatest city in Las Vegas!
  7. The Fremont Experience  brought downtown back to life
  8. Star Trek The Experience, Las Vegas Hilton
  9. Area 51  What the hell did I just see?
10. Mandalay Bay   The Sharks! The Sharks!
11. The lakes and the boating  Ain't nothing like it!
12. The Bellagio   One of the nicest hotels in the world.
13. Hear the Juliefest Soundtrack  The best music ever!
14. The Venetian
15. Food & Drink
16. Paris in Vegas!
17. The Strip at Night
      Treasure Island   Luxor   The Mirage
      The Strip at night is unlike anything in the world. Las Vegas is a non-stop city and
      just watching the traffic at night is fun.  Thousands of people constantly moving in
      every direction creates a Times Square-like buzz. Driving down the Strip at night
      is also something you need to experience. The crazy pirate fight at Treasure Island,
      the black Luxor pyramid shooting the largest beam of light in the world, the volcanoe*
      at the Mirage and the sheer majestry of these hueueueuge hotel complexes as they
      beg you to come to their casinoe*, not the other one,
 18. Hoover Dam
19. Get married by an Elvis Impersonator!
      You know it's going to last if Elvis says so.

  Click  Here  to see details of the first sixteen suggestions

 Talk to me!

 The Heartbreakers
   by Barbara Hartwell

  Click  Here

 It was quite a few years back, around the time I broke out of the black operations.
 I was conducting an investigation of some covert operations in an underground facility
 in Pine Bush, New York, connected to a Special Ops Training Base.The place was
 crawling with CIA; DARPA; Air Force Blue Berets and God only knows who all else.

 These guys had some incredibly advanced technology, like anti-gravity; cloaking devices;
 anomalous airborne craft, otherwise known as UFOs, all of which I witnessed at this
 particular location, just as I remembered the same scenario in other locations where
 I had been utilized in these types of operations.

 The Vegas Report

 New In this issue...

 Lap dances illegal????  There goes half of the Vegas economy!

 Save the wild horses...  They're starving to death due to drought

 More of 'The Prurient Interest'...  Things are getting out of control

 Things To Do (TTD) in Vegas

 Click  Here

  Clinton Wows Young AIDS Crowd

   Click  Here

 Clinton is receiving a wildly enthusiastic reception at the 14th International
 AIDS conference in Barcelona, which he is attending in the role of co-chair
 of the International AIDS Trust, a nonprofit that encourages policy makers
 to invest in effective prevention and care programs around the world.

 The response stands in stark contrast to the angry reaction U.S. Secretary
 of State Tommy Thompson got Tuesday when he was booed off the stage
 by protesters upset about American domestic and international policies on AIDS.

 Comment: I thought Colin Powell was Secretary of State

 They read it in Esch-sur-Alzette.
 They read it in Shibîn el Kôm
 They read it in St Paul, Minnesota

 Bush's Ghosts Won't Go Away
 Exonerated or not, the President can't easily shake off
 his past dealings as director of Harken Energy

  Click  Here

 There is no question that George W. Bush's second-biggest job as President is to
 restore faith in Corporate America and make the stock market safe again for investors.
 But as he wrestles with the demons that bedevil Big Business, he finds himself haunted
 by ghosts from the past.

 BartCop, ...come to Vegas!
 BartCop, Vegas is calling you.
 BartCop, over 90 different tequilas at the Hard Rock.....
 BartCop, ...BartCop...

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