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Volume 850 - X 


 Thursday   July 25, 2002.................................................................................. 
 After 3 years, Yahoo says there is no BartCop mail box, so don't send anything there until they
 manage to locate the damn thing.  Send everything to except business mail.
 That goes to and if it's "must see" send it to Christian at


"You know why the Enron investigation is dragging? Lieberman's afraid
 of what might come out of it. The Democrats are totally afraid because
 Ken Lay spent nights in the Lincoln Bedroom when Clinton was president.
 He's never been there when Bush was president."
    --Rush Limbaugh, lying his ass off for the one millionth time this year.
      White House records prove Lay stayed in the Lincoln Bedroom under Bush, not Clinton.
      The truth molester knows that, but he knows how gullible his sheep are.

       Hey, Rush, tell us again how Clinton had Randy Weaver murdered.

 Crooked president bankrupts the whole planet

  Click  Here

 Additional doubts about US corporate behavior cause FTSE to fall a further 2.5%,
 while markets elsewhere continue to plummet. Markets tumbled elsewhere,
 with Frankfurt down 3.2% and Paris off 2.4%.  In Asia, the Nikkei 225 in Tokyo
 had lost more than 2.5% to close below 10,000 for the first time since February.

We're going to buy what's left for a song,
 just like Daddy and Unka Dick planned.

 Hillary says 2000 election example of Supreme Court gone awry

 The 2000 presidential election case between George W. Bush and Al Gore is an example
 of a hypocritical Supreme Court majority that broadens the rights of states only when it
 serves conservative ends, Hillary said.

 Clinton criticized the court's recent trend of 5-4 cases that have favored state power over
 federal control. The case that ended Florida ballot recounts in the 2000 election was also
 a 5-4 vote, but it stripped a state of power to administer its own laws, the former first lady said.

 "Perhaps even more disturbing than the court's impulse to defend state and local prerogatives
 is the selectivity of that impulse," Clinton charged.


 Go Hillary!
 You've got my vote.


 "I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully."
     -- President Einstein

 Fuzzy Math Revisited
   by Gene Lyons

  Click  Here

 Temporarily incapable of adding and subtracting whole numbers, pundits affected
 not to recognize Bush's bogus statistics. Few noticed that his Social Security privatization
 scheme counted almost a third of the system's revenues twice--once to "invest" it in
 private accounts, twice to pay seniors' benefits. Instead, they focused upon Gore's
 clothing, and made a big deal of his exasperated sighs at Bush's absurd pronouncements.


 For those considering going to BartFest in Las Vegas, there is a posting board
 to share information, car pooling, room sharing etc at The BartCop Forum.

 Look for "Events"

 Soon, we'll have a private area for just those who are confirmed going,
 but this "Events" will get us started.

  Joe Conason's Journal
 Pinocchio in a miniskirt

  Click  Here

"Ann Coulter fans, and I use the term loosely, must proceed immediately to the Daily Howler.
 In this installment of his ongoing series about her and her best-selling compilation of fabrications,
 Bob Somerby provides further details of the flagrant disregard for facts that has always made
 Ann so special. As described in today’s Howler, what appears on her book’s final page is either
 a mistake that only a moron could make, or a lie that only a madwoman would tell in public.
 (I know because I re-checked Somerby’s facts, which took me all of 30 seconds.)
 To read this Howler item is like watching Pinocchio hooked up to a polygraph."

  Harvey Pitt Wants a Raise?
 CEC Chief Seeks Promotion and More Money

  Click  Here

 Harvey L. Pitt, chairman of the SEC, recently asked Congress for a raise
 and a promotion, the New York Whore Times reported on Wednesday.

 Hell yes he deserves a raise.
 As smoothly as the economy has been running, with honesty and dignity,
 we should reward this greedy bastard with a raise - and how about a bonus?
 How about some off-the-books stock options for Captain Greed?

 Will the Democrats bend over for this, too?

 Lucent Technologies announced a $7.91 billion loss
 for the fiscal third quarter and 7,000 more layoffs

  Just another day in Occupied America.

  A little something to stoke that Vegas Fever
 Vegas Trip Report
 (saw it on the  newsgroup)

 Click  Here

 In the Bellagio, sat down for a friendly round of BJ before dinner.  (He means Blackjack)
 Excellent dealer, great cocktail service, and very good drinks.
 Real Ketel One screwdrivers, strong, in nice, heavy glasses.
 What class!

 At one point, I hit a couple of stiff hands, decide to pull back a bit, when I suddenly see 2 hot chicks.
 On a whim, I put on 2 betting units. Win. Very next hand, have 2 sixes versus dealer 6. Split em up,
 and draw a five on the first hand. Double, draw another five to 16, stand. On the other six, draw an Ace
 - soft 17. Double, draw another six to 13, stand. So now I have $100 on the table with two stiffs versus
 the dealer's 6 (I'm betting $25 a hand.) !

 Dealer busts.
 Moral of this story: hot chicks are good luck.

 What's this?

 It's either the Nasdaq under The Unelected Fraud or it's a
 chart of his chances of winning a fair election for the first time.

They said he was hung - and they were right!
a MUST click

 Rob Lowe to exit 'West Wing'
   Flees role in salary beef

   Click  Here

ha ha
Who gets credit for these?
Who is Rich?


 The definition of conservative is "I've got mine, so screw you."
   -- Unknown

 Twice as bad as Hoover

   Click  Here

 George W. Bush is shattering records for the worst first 18 months in office
 for a U.S. president as measured by the benchmark Standard & Poor’s 500.
 In his first year-and-a-half in the White House, Bush presided over a 36.9
 percent decline, almost twice the percentage drop of Herbert Hoover,
 the president who led the nation into the Depression.

 Clinton Says Republicans Blocked His Audit Reforms

   Click  Here

"Asked about President Bush's handling of the economy and his attempts to rally investor confidence,
 Mr. Clinton, who was touring the construction site of his presidential library here, avoided criticizing his
 successor directly. Instead, he chided Republicans, who he said had blocked his administration's efforts to,
 among other things, bar accounting firms from working as auditors and consultants for the same companies.

"I'm sure that some of the people in Congress that stopped a lot of the reforms I tried to put through
 are probably rethinking that now," Mr. Clinton told reporters."

 Reminder: Joe Conason is daily now at


"I believe people have taken a step back and asked, 'What's important in life?'
 You know, the bottom line and this corporate America stuff--is that important?
 Or is serving your neighbor, loving your neighbor like you'd like to be loved yourself?"
    --President Moron, who spent most of his adult life milking that "corporate America stuff"

 We may be forced to endure 6 more years of never-elected,
 so I think it's important to remember to have a good time.
 Me? I have a good time every day, but I always have a great time in Vegas.
 Did you know Las Vegas means "tasty agave" in Spanish?

 Southwest Airlines has $95 fares to Las Vegas

 BartFest2002 - Party of the Year

 Make your own hotel reservations.

 Reminder: Las Vegas is NOT  Hollywood Boulevard.

 Update: I talked to Mary at the Pink Taco.
 She says she'd love to have us taste test several new tequilas she has.

 I was hoping to have an announcement today, but I don't - yet.
 Perhaps tomorrow's issue will have the great news I crave to tell you.
 Las Vegas is a gambling town, so we're kinda in this gamble together.

 I expect to find out between 7-10 PM tonight, so if you're in the chat room,
 you might see the good/bad news moments after it happens.

 September 28th -  tickets on sale!

 People are coming from as far as Uranus to attend BartFest.


 36. You meet the friendliest people in Nevada

  Traditionally,  the Army Rangers who guard Area 51 drive white Cherokees.
  This SUV looks like a big-ass silver Bronco, but you can bet if you meet an Army Ranger,
  he'll be very gentle and polite as he puts pressure on your neck with his boot.  You see, when
  you get to the spot on the dirt road where it's time to stop, you'll see a sign that says,
 "We may shoot you without warning if you cross this line."

  Sometimes people get froggy and cross that line and when that happens, far as I know,
  they don't really shoot you, but these Rangers take you into custody and they cuff you and
  hog-tie you and "F" with you until you wet your pants. If you give them any trouble, they kick
  you around and put their boot on your head/neck until you become compliant.  So when you go
  to BartFest, if you choose to go to Area 51, do NOT get froggy and step over the line
  because if you do, these men will send you home with an arrest record and a story of how badly
  you were abused so the next guy doesn't try anything.   By the way, there's nothing at Area 51,
  that's why it's the most heavily guarded chunk of desert in the world.

 You've read what people said about our first gathering.
 We intend to top that in Sin City come September.

 19 days from today...The Rio will ask "How many?"
 The party's on either way, but we have to know how big a room to buy.
 If we only get sixty people, maybe we'll rent ten limos & party on the go!

 Today's Hot Bonus Issue
  We put the extra-good stuff deep inside

  Click  Here

 You gotta read the Monkey Mail.
 It's probably the stupidest ever.


"I know how hard it is to put food on your family."
     -- and this guy has his finger on The Button?

You know why Bush has this clip on his hand?
(This is for real, he's been spotted twice with it)

It's to remind him not to mention bin Laden.

After soaring 50 approval points by swearing to get bin Laden "dead or alive,"
he's broken that vow and he doesn't want to talk about it. And since it doesn't
involve Clinton's zipper, the press will forgive a president for breaking his vows.

Most "powerful" man? Yeah right!


Russian Experiences:
Life in the Former USSR
and Post-Soviet Russia
Click for Review

Click to order

  Do they read  at the New York Times?
 It's Time for Augusta to Change
    by Selena Roberts

  Click  Here

 Somewhere, Hootie Johnson, the chairman of Augusta National Golf Club,
 must have been smiling when Tiger Woods shrugged off the controversy,
 saying there was nothing he could do about club policy.

 Of course, Woods has the power to do plenty.
 With one whisper of a boycott, biased bylaws would vanish.
 But such a commotion might disrupt his groove.
 Winning is too important to let advocacy get in his way.
 If Tiger Inc. had the human condition on his radar,
 he would not ignore Nike's history of treating its
 plant workers like third-class mail. .

 From Tuesday's Bonus section

  If Tiger wanted to, he could issue this demand:  "I refuse to play another round
  until every golf course and golf club in America accepts blacks and women."

 That's OK, NYT, take what you need...

 Cheney, Halliburton and Your Tax Dollars At Work

   Click  Here

"The London Sunday Observer reported over the weekend that during Cheney's tenure
 as CEO at Halliburton, the company reaped massive rewards in government contracts
 and bank loans for foreign deals, including one with a Russian firm currently under
 investigation for Russian Mafia connections...The Clinton White House and State Department
 tried to veto the Russian deal. The Clinton administration was concerned over intelligence
 reports that Tyumen was controlled by a holding conglomerate, the Alfa Group, which had
 been investigated by Russian authorities for alleged Mafia connections.

 But, after intense lobbying by Halliburton, the objections were ignored by House Republicans.
 One of Halliburton's top lobbyists at the time was David Gribben, who had been Cheney's
 chief of staff during Cheney's days at the Pentagon."

 They are stealing billions of dollars, but since it's not Clinton,
 there will be no serious investigations, no price to pay - nothing.

 Burn, baby, burn



"The U.S. military did, in fact, train bin Laden in all the basic skills he might have
  needed to pull off this attack. It's common knowledge that our men in khaki also
  trained Saddam Hussein, Manuel Noriega and a host of other vile thugs behind
"blowback" attacks on us. And that the real seat of oil-based terror is Saudi Arabia,
  to which the Bushies pander and plead on an hourly basis."
     --Harvey Wasserman, It's a Conspiracy!,

 While this is true, it should be pointed out that they did it under orders from Bush.

 Is it wise to support

 The $17 figure was suggested as a reasonable monthly amount.
 That's 54 cents a day.    Is  worth 54 cents a day?

 Click to subscribe for $17 a month.

 Subject: GOLD you say??

 Umm, Bart....
 Don't the Bushes own the gold industry too?
 I remember reading something icky about gold mines..

 Take care,

 That's another way the B.F.E.E is making a profit on Bush's depression.
 The B.F.E.E is in bed with Barrick Mining, the company alleged to have
 buring a bunch of miners alive to teach the others that they don't tolerate
 work stoppages when thr B.F.E.E has money to be made.

 They sued my good friend Greg Palast for telling the truth about that.
 They sued him in England where the truth is NOT a defense in a libel trial.
 better not get near the B.F.E.E with the truth - they'll make you pay.

 Barrick Mining controls 51 percent of the world's gold production.
 A world-wide depression is just what the B.F.E.E needs.
 If Tequilaboy in Oklahoma can see this, why can't the press?
 Why can't the pink tutu Democrats see it?

 Bart, you're so negative!
 You see the glass as half empty.
 Please don't bother our president
 with these baseless accusations.
 Dubya's a good man, doing a great job.

 Oh, I really need a drink...

 They read it in Shijiazhuang, but they read it right-to-left
 They read it in Maussane les Alpilles.
 They read it in Altadena, CA, where they love the First Amendment.


"When a big corporation goes under, those with connections get tipped off long
  before Joe Shmoe and his pet portfolio. If a Bush loses liquidity, friends will come
  running, checkbooks open, as they did for George W. to pay for his string of failed
  Texas investments. Besides, the family trust fund is where the "real" money is kept."
     --Robert Scheer, Expect a war soon,

 BartCop, ...come to Vegas!
 BartCop, Vegas is calling you.
 BartCop, over 90 different tequilas at the Hard Rock.....
 BartCop, ...BartCop...

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