...if not now, when?
POLITICS - HUMOR -
FINE TEQUILA - OUTRAGE
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Julie Hiatt Steele
"Exciting news for Ann Coulter fans: Her editor
at Crown Publishers says that they are in
deep consultation with the wacky winger about correcting at least one atrocious slander in her
bestselling book of that title. This could be the beginning of a heavy workload for the Crown
clean-up crew, assuming that they sincerely intend to amend Coulter's text to reflect facts rather
than prejudices. Will somebody please give Pepper a Nexis subscription and a shovel?"
--Joe Conason, Joe Conason's Journal, Stop the Presses, 08/06/02
If the White House is empty, it must be August
After bringing America to the brink of economic collapse and hammering out the framework
of his permanent police state, George W. Bush is taking August off for vacation. The rest of us
who have to work for a living can expect absurd photo ops to abound (e.g., Bush is the only
person in Texas who chops wood in the middle of August). While Bush putters about on his ranch
in his golf cart, dressed in silly cowboy duds, the nation should take a collective sigh of relief.
With presidents like this, who needs enemies?
The Clinton Miracle
Rush spent the first hour Thursday saying the "Clinton Miracle"
was nothing more
than a fraud, built on cooking the federal books and he should be ashamed of himself.
This comes after eight years of Rush guaranteeing
us that the "Clinton Miracle"
was actually the genius of Ronald Reagan and supply-cide economics, and if not that,
all credit should go to the House of Newt.
Pigboy, why do you hop from untrue slur to untrue slur?
Wouldn't your odds be better if you stuck with just one side of a slur?
It would be so much fun to get Rush in the witness chair, with
a fair and impartial judge
who would force Rush to respond to simple questions - yes or no.
I'd have him broken and sobbing in under six minutes.
From: Jim Kelly
Subject: Bart got somebody fired! Can you guys do anything?
Ouch, Bart is indirectly responsible for
this LA Times staffer getting fired!
Do something guys!
"BRIAN ROBIN LIKES TO PERUSE THE HILARIOUSLY
progressive Web site Bartcop.com. One Sunday night in July, in the privacy of his
Lancaster home, Robin came upon an item about an appearance by Congressman
Bill Thomas (R-Bakersfield) on CNN, where he repeated the Republican Party
mantra that blames the year's corporate criminality on Bill Clinton.
Robin couldn't let Thomas, a career politician
who wields great power as chairman
of the House Ways and Means Committee, get away with it. Robin put together an
e-mail, with the opening salvo "Surely you can't be that stupid," and went on to
compare Clinton's achievements to Bush's and Cheney's various business failures
and wrongdoings. Along the way, he took a swipe at Thomas himself: "I'm not a
morally bankrupt Republican congressman who opts for partisanship ahead of truth."
Jim, ...take a deep breath.
I'm willing to help if I can, but the way I see things, Robin
wrote a harmless e-mail that
caused that prick Bill Thomas to get him fired. I had nothing to do with it.
In Volume 859 - Gonna Raise Hell, Robin's wife wrote:
> Last week my husband was fired from his job
as a reporter with the Los Angeles Times.
> He had sent an e-mail to Rep. Bill Thomas (R-Bakersfield/Kern County) taking issue with
> some comments made by Congressman Thomas on a CNN program.
That's not the same as "Bart got him
I don't think CNN got him fired, either. I think Bill Thomas is a heartless caveman who "got even"
with someone who never did him any harm and the LA Times was petty enough to fire him.
OK, you can exhale now...
Why we must invade Iraq RIGHT NOW!
and Let Die*
by Isaac Peterson
Someone who had heard about the Supreme Court's last two decisions about the death penalty
might think we had a new Supreme Court.. A few weeks ago, they said we can't execute mentally
retarded people, and then that jury had to decide whether someone should be executed, not a judge.
It should have been plain old common sense.
But three Extreme Court 'justices' disagreed with the decision.
If you've been paying attention, I don't need to name the three. (If you haven't been paying attention, it was
Scalia, Thomas, and Rehnquist. Don't these guys like anything that doesn't hurt somebody else?).
Sidebar: My good friend Isaac is coming to BartFest
in Las Vegas. Like all of us, he's looking
forward to meeting and partying with the people he's gotten to know thru e-mails and chats.
George W Bush's
Scorecard of Evil
President Bush took a sharp right turn in policy soon after his inauguration, surprising a country
that heard a carefully crafted message of moderate governance during the campaign. He's picked
some strange battles early in his administration, prompting an outcry from everyone ranging from
liberal Democrats to moderate Republicans. It's getting harder every day to remember all of the
truly mystifying policies the Bush administration is pursuing, so the Wage Slave Journal offers this
scorecard to help you keep track of all of the evil deeds Bush commits and, more important,
to provide a record for your perusal when November 2004 rolls around.
"President Bush passed his yearly physical
with flying colors yesterday.
And he is very proud – it's not often he passes an exam."
war with Iraq, consider this
by Carla Binion (She's one of the best)
Before this nation invests trillions of dollars and spills the blood of innocents over war with Iraq,
Congress and the American people should consider the following. The first Bush administration
lied to and manipulated Congress, the American public and the Arab peoples in order to win
support for the Gulf war. Dick Cheney was then George H. W. Bush's Secretary of Defense,
and Paul Wolfitz was a Defense Department aide.
Side note: Because of the Gulf War, the Bush family obtained
rights to drill in Bahrain.
The Gulf War put b i l l i o n s of dollars in the Bush family coffers.
You think this coming war won't do the same?
Why do you think they stole the White House? To help working families?
"The Gambino crime family is now falling
apart, with Gotti gone.
So now, the biggest crime organization in New York is the Catholic Church."
The Gore-Bruce flap
The Media Whores Online version
"Seventy-five bucks for the Boss? Forget about
it, give me two dozen tickets," said Tipper,
as she and her staff hogged more than their fair share, seemingly oblivious to their conspicuous glutton.
Hmmm, not sure about the "glutton" part. If they'd only gotten
tickets for themselves, I think the press
would label the Gores as "greedy." Besides, first time I had a chance to buy Zeppelin tickets,
I bought 33, and the gig was almost 400 miles away, but then, I enjoy my life.
The Fox News version
"They wound up being offered four," says
"But when they were asked to pay $75 apiece, they said forget it.
And you know, that's why Gore isn't president, in a nutshell."
No, Gore isn't president because the B.F.E.E. and a crooked
court fixed the election.
Never trust Fox news. They lie when the truth would suit them better
I hate beating up one of the good guys, but...
...the subject was legalized pot
There goes Paul Begala again!
Instead of taking the lefty point of view, and instead of at least faking it and fighting
for his team, he joined Bob Novak in ridiculing the pro-logic, pro-pot guy.
Why can't Begala speak for the left?
Was Enron's Cliff Baxter killed over the Merrill Lynch deal?
The initial plan for the power deal, the executives said, was to create a kind of mirror swap in which
Enron would purchase energy contracts from Merrill and Merrill would simultaneously purchase energy
contracts from Enron. But Arthur Andersen and Merrill Lynch were troubled by the structure of that deal,
former executives said, worried that it amounted to a wash transaction from which no profits could be claimed.
With time winding down on the fourth quarter,
Enron put pressure on Merrill and the Andersen accountants
to help it complete some kind of deal.
You just gotta see this.
It's what a Democratic TV ad might look like if the Dems weren't geldings.
But no, it's not polite to mention the FACTS when fighting fascism.
Dear Mr. BartCop:
About six weeks ago, a guy at work turned me on
to your web site. I noticed you had a lot
to say about Rush Limbaugh. I had never heard of him before. Your comments made me curious
so one day I switched from the music I usually listen to on the radio and started listening to Rush's show.
Well anyway, I'm hooked. You turned me into
a real "Ditto-head." I just love Rush and he makes
so much sense. He always gives both sides of the argument, too. He is not so one-sided like you are
and I am beginning to notice newsreaders like Brokaw, Jennings and Rather are, too.
I never miss Rush's show now and I have you to thank. It has changed my life.
This is stalker mail.
My stalkers live and breathe bartcop.com
Every waking moment of their lives is dedicated to this page.
It's what they think about at work, at school, even in church.
They can't get enough, no matter how many times they read and re-read this page.
They are very, very sick people, but it does demonstrate that the hammer is getting bigger.
There are other pro-logic sites they could stalk, but they want to stalk the big one - bartcop.com
If one of them gets published, he gets the "special seat" inside the
And then, ...at the big moment, ...they cry out my name together, in unison.
"Today I drove by Robert Blake's house
I saw a sign that said "For sale by killer"!"
big Bonus Section today
We even get to the bottom of that "Bomb Mecca" comment.
Click Here to see today's extra good Bonus Section
BartFest2002 - Party of the Year
Make your own hotel reservations.
Big News: Nothing yet, but that could change any moment.
The dice have been rolled!
I saw a commercial for Branson, Missouri.
They call it "The New Vegas."
Yeah, that's what it is, all right - Vegas without teeth.
In the commercial, they show two Gomers on the backs of ostriches - racing.
Previously I said "Vegas has everything."
I was lying. I'm pretty sure you can't ride in an ostrich race on The Strip.
Six days from todayThe Rio will ask "Bart, you in or out?"
...we are out on a limb, ...isn't it exciting?
(Oh, God, please don't let me lose my ass on this!)
28th - tickets
Las Vegas - an oasis in a religiously insane country
Click Here to see Bart's 40 (so far) things to do in Vegas.
Click Here to see Dave's 100 Things to do in Vegas
Talk to me!
Subject: Too easy on the pink tutu Democrats?
Is there not one leading, elected Democrat who
will hit those Bush bastards
as hard as he can, then hit them again? If he did, he would become a hero to millions.
He would be accused by the whore press of demagoguery and class baiting, but so what?
What is a dramatic way for the Bartcop.com community
to communicate our disgust?
How can we make the leading Democrats pay such a serious price for their spinelessness
that speaking the truth will become less painful than continuing to grovel like a worm?
Brad, I'll tell you what's going to happen.
Someday, a Democrat is going to stand up and say "Enough, Mr. President!"
and become the most powerful man in politics. My question is - where is he now?
What the hell is he waiting for?
(I hope you weren't suggesting me :)
Sidebar: Let's hope that man isn't Klayman, Barr or Burton.
Donate to bartcop.com
Click below to become a Corona Light volunteer for
We've got to build a bigger hammer.
Click Here to donate large.
For my money, this is the best column Molly ever wrote
Instead of picking on someone his own size, Rush consistently targets
dead people, little girls, and the homeless--none of whom can fight back.
by Molly Ivins
No need - get 'em, Molly.
Saudis lash US 'Christian extremists'
Two of the craziest extremists
The Saudi press has launched a vitriolic attack on what it describes as Christian
fundamentalism in the United States. One newspaper, al-Watan, said Christian
fundamentalism was no less dangerous to international peace and security than
other forms of religious extremism. Another paper, Watani, said the international
media had concentrated only on Muslim fundamentalism, forgetting that Christian
fundamentalism was just as dangerous.
Hey, it's all fear-based insanity, invented to separate
the scared from their money.
People need to throw off the shackles of superstition and embrace science and logic.
If people did that, we'd still have the World Trade Centers standing in New York.
Instead, we have thousands of raped Catholic boys.
They read it in Antrwep, Belgium.
They read it in N'Djamena, Chad.
They read it in Plattsburgh, New York as they count the days to BartFest!
Use the portal below and they'll throw bartcop.com a nickel and
it costs you nothing more than whatever you were going to pay.
Read the Previous Issue
It had everything.
© 2002, bartcop.com
Heard at BartFest