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Fair & balanced
POLITICS - HUMOR - FINE TEQUILA - OUTRAGE - TRAVEL - ENTERTAINMENT Before we name
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Who
needs accountability when you've got flexibility?
by Christian Livemore
Excerpt:
And only a body with very quick reflexes
could campaign on a package of
tax cuts for the rich which they proposed
in 1999 when the economy was
percolating like Mrs. Folgers coffee pot,
and now claim that the package
was designed to stimulate a weak economy.
And only folks with contortion abilities
worthy of Harry Houdini (or a
very unhealthy interest in other peoples'
sex lives) could spend six years
and $65 million investigating if and when
Bill Clinton received consensual
oral sex from a willing adult, and then
caution reporters against turning
the Bush Administration's ties to Enron
into a "partisan witch hunt."
Quotes
"Thank
you James Earl Ray for keeping the dream alive.''
-- plaque
for actor James Earl Jones intended to honor Dr King on his birthday
Enron Avoided Income Taxes in 4 of 5 Years
Excerpt:
Enron paid no income taxes in four of
the last five years,
using almost 900 subsidiaries in tax-haven
countries and other techniques,
an analysis of its financial reports to
shareholders shows.
It was also eligible for $382 million in
tax refunds.
Well, is anyone surprised?
The Bush Family Evil Empire
took Enron's money during the crooked campaign,
then President Losttheelection cut them
a taxpayer-funded check for $382,000,000.
That's how the Evil Empire makes
money - they deal with crooks, then steal money
from the treasury to repay those crooks.
Remember how the Crooked White House failed
to help California when Enron was raping them on
energy prices last year? Remember those
reports of Enron charging TEN TIMES what they charged last year?
So, with Bush's blessing, Enron made unearned
billions from California families,
plus Bush kicked in $382M for Enron, and
THEN they filed bankruptcy?
This is Bush's plan for all of us - if we stand by and do nothing.
From: EasilyAmused@aol.com
Subject: Ashcroft on MLK!
BC,
I was just watching CNN and they had Ashcroft
on.
He was giving a speech in memorial to Martin
Luther King.
They couldn't have found one person in the administration
to give that speech besides Ashcroft?
Using a man who vehemently fought civil rights
to wax poetic about the guy he tried to shut down.
What a slap in the face!
~Margie
That's why I can't forgive Daschle and rubberstamp
Leahy for confirming that bastard.
"I am the
Central Scrutinizer.
Who you calling bastard, Funnyboy?"
What
is Bush Hiding?
...and why isn't the press even a little curious?
Excerpt:
President Bush, who was governor from 1995
to 2000, has chosen to house his records in his father's
Presidential Library and Museum at Texas
A&M University, which is administered by the National
Archives and Records Administration and
is not subject to Texas' open records law.
So, he wants to prevent his records from been seen - why?
If Bush was legal, honest and above board,
he could show his papers like
every other governor and every other president
in history - but noooooooooooooo.
He's hiding something?
Why can't we know what the Bush Family
Evil Empire is up to?
He's spending taxpayer money - secretly
- and we can't see what he's buying?
If we had a right to Clinton's sex life,
why is the Bush Empire stuff off-limits?
Why do we have more business inside Clinton's
zipper
than the record of Bush's majesty in Texas?
(Or Reagan's presidential papers, for that matter)
The Bush Family Evil Empire cannot stand
the daylight of honesty.
Why?
To protect Junior's illegal ascension (and
that of his father as VP) they must burn all records,
shred all files (just like Enron) and pardon
those who have Bush-guilty knowledge.
Why?
Why isn't the press curious about the covered-up crimes?
From: Joe
Subject: How Limbaugh Lies, Part 147
The Truth Detector said today that it now appears
that Enron gave
even more money to Democrats than they did to
Republicans.
Ha!
He then said that Enron "gave $450,000 to Democrats; that's what they spent on lobbying."
How stupid do you have to be to get fooled by that statement?
Let me show you my version of his statement,
"BartCop gave $3,000 to the Catholics last
year; that's what he spent on beverages."
There's nothing wrong at all with asking "compared
to who?" when your side is being criticized
for allegedly unseemly behavior. But you
have to be honest about it. You can't say,
"Dems took even more from Enron than did Republicans,"
UNLESS IT'S TRUE.
You'd think the Truth Detector would know that.
The problem with Rush is that he's a truth
molester.
That's right - he's a long time, serial truth
molester and he must be stopped.
He's out of control, destroying reputations
and hurting innocent people every day.
Worse than that, he molests the truth ...in
God's name.
Shame, shame on the vulgar Pigboy for molesting
the truth in God's name.
I'll bet God isn't all that happy about it, either.
by Mark Batchelor
Excerpt:
Like most sequels, Bush II has been working
hard to out-do its original incarnation:
More tax cuts, more right-wing policies,
bigger wars. Like "Die Harder," with its vastly
increased body count and exponentially
larger explosions than the first movie in that series,
Bush II is an inflated version of the original.
God help us.
Britney
Spears caught without her wig!
Sales are down as pre-teens suddenly realize
she can't sing, either.
From: Rochesterjim@aol.com
Subject: Dick Cheney Has Done A "D.B. Cooper" And Vanished
Haliburton Corporation took in millions and millions
of dollars from Enron
for "services rendered," while Dick Cheney ran
the company. Dick Cheney
received 34 million dollars from Haliburton when
he left the company.
Where is Dick Cheney?
I suspect that he has done a "D.B. Cooper" and
vanished.
Jim in Rochester, MI
Last week, I asked:
> Why is John Fund marrying this Morgan Pillsbury lady?
> Could it be so Morgan cannot testify against
him?
> What crimes, if any, has John Fund of
the Whore Street Journal committed?
> What does Morgan know that she can testify
to?
Well, AMPOL has busted the story wide
open.
Police
say John Fund beat up his future mother-in-law!
No wonder the Whore Street Journal fired
his woman-beating ass.
During impeachment, Fundie was all
over Clinton's "immorality,"
but Clinton isn't a woman-beater now
is he?
You'd have to be a real scumbag to beat up a woman.
Eye
of the Beholder
by
Tally Briggs
Excerpt:
The lazy people I know all have a lot of
money. Some have trust funds they live off of. They also
have no imagination. They sit at home,
usually only having the energy to call their dealer, roll
another joint, or play non-stop Nintendo.
They have no idea what the majority of the world
struggles through day after day, nor do
they care. Perhaps that's why they insist no one wants to
work. They certainly don't, and are very
happy living off of mostly their parents's money.
"I am the
Central Scrutinizer.
This
Briggs fella - playing the class-envy socialist card...
...we'd
better open up a file on him, too.
These
BartCop operatives are usually the subversive type."
I found this great graphic in my cartoon
box the other day, and used it.
I didn't know it was from whitehouse.org
where Betty Bowers is writing.
My theft was unintentional.
White House Denies Barney Knew about Enron Collapse
Excerpt:
In a press conference last week, presidential
spokesman Ari Fleischer repeatedly denied
that Barney even knew Kenneth Lay. However,
in an internal memo leaked from Enron's
executive committee, the happy-go-lucky
Scottie dog was apparently being contemplated
as a possible scapegoat for the missing
documents from the Arthur Andersen company.
From: jpickle25@hotmail.com
Subject: Bush and his pretzel
Why did I know that this would be top story for
you worthless,
left winged, same sex loving, losers at BartCrap.com?
Al Gore Lost
Signed,
jim pickle
Well, Jim, it's nice to meet you, too.
Bush's struggle with the pretzel proved a widely-held
theory:
That he couldn't chew and remain conscious at
the same time.
I'd love to see a poll on how many people bought the stupid pretzel story.
Besides, you guys spent nine years on Clinton's
cock.
Why shouldn't we giggle at Mr. Salty's assault
on President Weak & Stupid?
Saw this on a page done by Dan
Chaney (no relation,
I assume)
I also noticed he listed Chinaco
Anejo as "an influence."
click
It's Harry Carey and Jerry Lewis doing a
scene from Pulp Fiction.
Good stuff, Dan.
click
Why should you care?
Give Bush what he wants.
Andrew
Sullivan, small-time whore
by KuhWaver
Excerpt:
This one's a read-meater for the flat-earthers:
it is how Clinton applied "new constraints
to be placed on the CIA." He's talking
about the way Clinton avoided finding someone
who will eventually turn on you like bin
Laden did. And why are you trying to defend
the honor of these genocidal Sudanese,
Master Sullivan?
From: 1yoj@bellsouth.net
Subject: Enron's Collapse
The debacle at Enron is the most solid argument
that the Social Security Trust Fund should not
be in the hands of the private sector.
Imagine the tragedy visited upon the most vulnerable in
America after finding out that Social Security
had been looted by it's "Funds Managers."
"OOPS!! We lost all of YOUR money after
WE got paid, BIG TIME,
for all our hard work!! Get over
it, you freeloaders!!!"
They just cancelled the X-Files.
Too bad.
It was once a great show.
From: Hesiod
Subject: Will Bush pardon Ken Lay?
We ought to start a campaign to get the press
to ask him this question
at every opportunity, until he answers
it.
Let's FORCE Dubyah to promise he will never pardon
Ken Lay, or anyone else
who may be responsible for violating Federal
Criminal statues in the Enron case.
We ought to pound this every chance we get.
Happy Birthday to...
........
Susanna Hoffs is 45
Betty White is 80
Also born today - James Earl Jones (1931) Andy
Kaufman (1949) Maury Povich (1939)
Muhammad Ali (1942) Al "Scarface" Capone (1899)
Jim Carrey (1962) Ben Franklin (1706)
Today is the fourth anniversary of the press losing all ethics
On January 17, 1998, the New York Times
appointed Matt Drudge as head of their editorial board
and made him president of their news division.
His first act as boss was to break the Monica story,
then he molested the truth, shot it in
the head, put it in the trunk of a Buick Regal and drove it to Jersey
where the truth was buried, with the respectability
of the press in a shallow grave six miles west of Bayonne.
That's some sad shit...
I'm so old, I remember when you could
semi-trust the newspapers.
But their insatiable thirst for Clinton-cock
stories changed everything
Hint:
Those bartcop.com stickers should start arriving today.
If you don't have a digital camera or a
scanner (to send in your sticker location pics)
you can get an extra copies of prints for
about $1.50 - cheap for immortality.
I've ordered more stickers, but they say
it'll take 30 days or so...
Quotes
"Earlier today, Bush's cabinet told him that
they had nothing to do
with helping Enron ...and Bush had
trouble swallowing that as well.''
-- Letterman
...ayiyiyiyiyiyi!
...the BartCop
Hex!!
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