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Volume 846 - Freedom Snatch

click for special rates

 Fri-Sat    July 19-20, 2002 


 "What this country needs is another giant tax curt for the super-rich
   so Bush's billionaire buddies can buy what's left of the stock market."
     -- BartCop, in heavy sarcasm mode, after Friday's 404 point Dow drop

   But how long before some Scaife-financed idiot says that seriously?

 Bush sets a bad example

  Click  Here

 So I'm wondering: How can a White House so obsessed with secrecy
 convince corporate America of the merits of full and timely disclosure?

 For instance, President Bush won't authorize the SEC to release information
 about its insider-trading probe into his stock deals because the matter is "ancient history."

 Bush is crooked as hell and everybody knows it,
 including the Democrats that are helping him empty the Treasury.

 Rush is so proud of Mr. Perfect, Tiger Woods
  for refusing to help women get in Augusta National.

  Tiger says Augusta has a right to pick their member because it's a private club.
 "Augusta National is entitled to set up their own rules the way they want them.
  That's the way they want to set it up. It's their prerogative to set it up that way.
  ... It's just the way it is."

  Attribution:  He's a Hypocrite with a Gutless Stance

 I have a question:
 I wonder what Tiger would say if he sat down in some fancy restaurant and was told,
 "Hey, boy, we don't serve niggers in this restaurant."

 I wonder if Tiger would say, "That's the way they want to set it up.
 It's their prerogative to set it up that way.  ... It's just the way it is."

 All those millions and he can't give a little back?
 Someone said Tiger had over a hundred million so far,
 and he can't give a little back to help other minorities?

 Admit it - I had this greedy republican bastard pegged years ago.
 Just like Rush, he's got his hundred million, so screw everyone behind/beneath him.

 Mr. Perfect was the first ever recipient of The BartCop Hex.
 (The Unelected Fraud and are also struggling to overcome the BartCop Hex.)

 Dow falls another 400 points Friday
  The young Bush boy handles the economy just like his daddy.


 He's killing the market so the B.F.E.E. and the Carlyle Group can buy what's left for pennies.

 Saw it on BartCop MIRC Chat

 If it's a crime for Lindh to hang out with the Taliban,
 what about all those folks in Texas the Taliban was
 talking to before the pipeline deal fell through?

 If you've never visited the chat, you ought to give it a try.
 You don't have to say anything, you won't be in any spotlight.
 After lurking for a while, somebody will say something that needs
 a response, and next thing you know you're a regular player in there.

 I've been in the chat room 80-100 times, and have never seen it dead.  is global, and even in the middle of the night there are people chatting.
 We have readers in the Europe, Hawaii, Hong Kong, Fiji, Austria etc.

 ...and they even speak English!

 Click Here  for instructions how to get in.

"I would not resign if
 my name was resign."

 Should Nevada waste time and money chasing pot smokers?

  Click  Here

 There are three good reasons for Nevadans to vote "yes"
 on Nevada's marijuana initiative on November 5, 2002.

 1.  Arresting adults for marijuana wastes valuable resources
 2.  Patients should have access to a safe supply
 3.  There should be common-sense restrictions

 A Robert Plant concert story

  Click  Here

 Oddly enough, we were at this show, too.
 This is the night where "No Jacket Required" was born at the Ambassador (?) hotel
 because they wouldn't let Phil Collins (or Ol' Bart) in the fancy bar without a jacket.
 That's story's buried like the Coyote cafe story (which John Mo found - thanks!)

 When that story first ran, I heard from lots of people who'd been there, worked there etc.

 I'll buy you a shot of Chinaco in Vegas if you're the first to find that "No Jacket required" story

 The "Inside Bush" Poop


 Modern digital proctological devices allow us to go
 way beyond simple polyps, nodes and nodules to reveal
 the complex inner hard-core workings of the man himself.

 That's pretty rich, Bush

  Click  Here

"My friends are crooks. The companies they run look corrupt.
 The regulators I appoint are too soft. My colleagues in government face lawsuits for fraud.
 But I'm going to solve corporate crime with some ass-kicking laws.
 Hey, and trust me, I'm the President."

 Woods two behind as putter fails him


  Click  Here

 Hey, Tiger old buddy, what seems to be the problem?
 I wonder if he's having trouble concentrating?

 Hex on thee!
 Hex on thee!
 Hex on thee!

  Secretly giving our money away to his corporate friends
 Treasury circumventing Hill on tax breaks
   Click  Here
 In a series of little-noticed executive orders intended to ease the tax burden on corporate
 America, the Bush administration has implemented a number of new policies that will provide
 corporations with billions of dollars in tax relief without the consent of Congress.

"That's the hallmark of this administration," said Sen. Jay Rockefeller (D-W.Va.).
"I really believe this is a corporate administration." "Of course it's an end-run around Congress."

I used to read your page because I thought you were funny and it was nice to read the truth for a change.
You even printed letters from Dittoheads, just to let them get their side in.  I just looked at the Forum,
and noticed it's moderated.  So then, if you don't like wht the other side has to say you hide it from your readers?

Dude, I was wrong about you.
You're just as big of an arrogant, close minded, one-sided prick as Rush.
You're just an anal retentive asshole after all.

Fuck you very much,

Ben Henderson

Thanks for taking the time to get both sides before making up your mind.

FYI, I print every reasonable derog letter that I see. We tried going unmoderated on the posting boards,
but the Freepers immediately went into a discussion of Hillary's genitalia that used the most graphic and
vulgar terms ever spoken by man.  Maybe you'd enjoy reading a few hundred posts like that?

Next time ask a question instead of coming on like a ditto-monkey.

 Sharon Osbourne Says Cancer Has Spread

   Click  Here

"'I've always had a plan that I'd get sick before she did, that I'd die before she did.
  But my plan didn't work out....Life has a way of kicking you in the nuts..."

 Reminder: Joe Conason is daily now at

Subject: Herbert Hoover Didn't Accept Responsibility Either

Hoover never accepted responsibility for the great depression of 1929, much like George W. Bush
doesn't accept responsibility now for our great recession with all its joblessness, stock market crashes,
corruption, massive budget deficit and failed national security.

"I didn't do it" is a phrase once made popular by Bart Simpson, but it seems appropriate now for
Bush and his Administration. Whatever happened to the phrase "the buck stops here"?
Is this administration responsible for nothing?

Jim in Rochester, MI

Subject:  9th Circuit


There has been much rumbling from the NeoCons (especially after the "Under God" ruling, a ruling that
I applaud) that the US 9th Circuit is the most reversed circuit of the US appellate courts.   I've always been
somewhat impressed by the 9th Circuit.  They have historically led the way in the advanced thinking of
modern courts.  But for those ditto monkeys that spout that the 9th Circuit is the most reversed court in the
country, they should consider this letter written to, and published in, the NY Whore Times.

"To the Editor:

Re "Court That Ruled on Pledge Often Runs Afoul of Justices" (front page, June 30),
about the United States Court of Appeals for the Ninth  Circuit:

In the calendar year 2001, the Ninth Circuit terminated 10,372 cases, and was reversed in 14,
with a correction rate of 1.35 per thousand.   The Fourth Circuit, reputedly the most conservative
circuit and the circuit with the second-largest number of cases reviewed by the Supreme Court,
terminated 5,078 cases and was reversed in 7, making a correction rate of 1.38 per thousand.

U.S. Circuit Judge, 9th Circuit
San Francisco, July 1, 2002"

I've never read a more eloquent "F**k you!" in my life.  If the Dems allow Commander Chimp to restructure
the 9th Circuit to mirror the 4th, the numbers clearly show that they are intent on reducing the quality of the courts.

Jim H.

 I didn't know CBS was webcasting nudity, did you?
  The girls of Big Brother 3 get naked for kids to watch at home - thanks CBS.

  Click  Here  to see a tame example

 Hey, CBS, I enjoy pictures of cute, naked women like all men,
 but why would they webcast this stuff so children could see it?

 Gee, could it be the money?

 Uncut 'Osbournes' Headed to Canada

  Click  Here

 The air is about to turn blue in the rec rooms of Canadian TV viewers as English-language
 broadcaster CTV brings "The Osbournes" uncut onto the conventional TV schedule.

 Unlike MTV in the US and MTV Canada, CTV programmers have decided not to censor
 the colorful turns of phrases of Ozzy and his family in the wildly successful reality-TV series.

 Thank Koresh in America we have the religiously insane to protect us
 from the normal, everyday language that most Americans use.

Subject: Ann Coulter on the Daily Show

I don't know if you saw it, but John Stewart interviewed Ann Coulter on Wednesday evening
(rerun early Thursday evening) on the Daily Show. He managed to be extremely civil, although
the audience was less reserved. At one point, Ann actually said "all Democrats are evil" or
something to that effect (it may have been corrupt or bad, instead of evil).

The entire audience started to loudly boo and hiss at her. She very quickly backtracked and tried
to say that the audience was, of course, an exception. John kept on coming back to his viewpoint,
which is that he felt that the extremes of "liberalism" vs. "conservatism" were somewhat passe and
most people didn't think in those terms any more. Ann immediately, and hypocritically, agreed with him.

Saying something to the effect of "you're right. Definitely right. It's all of those damn liberals who
keep on going on about the differences between us and them. And that's why they're evil and
conservatives are good." Hey, Ann. If you agree with John's point of view so much,
why don't you shut the hell up?


 Southwest Airlines just announced $99 fares to Las Vegas
 Go to  - see what kind of deal you can get.

 BartFest2002 - Party of the Year

 Make your own hotel reservations.

 Reminder: Las Vegas is NOT Dollywood.

 September 28th -  tickets on sale! Now with working link!

 Update: After seeing The Palms on Las Vegas: High Rises and High Stakes,
 I gave them a call to ask about rooms that historic weekend.
 $299 each, even Sunday
 That's compares to The Rio's All-Suites with glass walls for $169 and $69 on Sunday.
 Look at all that money we just saved!

 People are coming from as far as Europe to attend BartFest.


 Things to do in the Vegas area!

29. Zion and Bryce
   Zion National Park might remind you of Yosemite,
   but there's nothing like Bryce Canyon anywhere on the planet.

   Let's start with Zion National Park.
   Believe it or not, Zion National Park was built by dinosaurs millions of years ago.
   "Zion" isn't a Jewish word, it's the Anastazi Indian word for "giant bear."
   Dinosaurs had the same buried instincts as elephants, and they knew when it was their time to die
   so they all trekked to Zion Valley and collapsed on top of each other. Sometimes a dying dino would
   collapse on a not-yet dying dino and there'd be a big, nasty fight.  Thousands of dinasaurs died here,
   and as time went by, limestone creeped into the carcuses and pretrified them like the forest,
   creating these giant mounds. It's really a sight to behold.

   But that's nothing compared with the secret story of Bryce Canyon.
   Otto Bryce was a civil war soldier who was caught looting banks. He buried his booty and after he
   escaped prison, he went west and used part of his loot to buy chisels and hammers. His gang of men then
   kidnapped 1200 Ute artists and enslaved them to do his bidding. He forced these 1200 Indians to carve
   oddly-shaped spirals into the sandstone for 12 years.

   After twelve years of forced labor, the Indian artists thought they'd be freed, but Bryce decided
   there wasn't enough color so he used the rest of his booty to buy paint, and forced the Indians
   to paint this "Valley of Spirals" for another 6 years. So after eighteen tears, Bryce finally had his
   beautifully painted canyon and he freed the Indians slaves who then founded the Mormon Church.
   To this day, these facts are only whispered because of the taint of the slave labor.
   The locals re-named the Valley of Spirals "Bryce Canyon," so Otto would get all the blame.
   But even though it was hand-carved and painted by local artists, it's an amazing sight to see.
  Click  Here  to see the first twenty eight things to do in Vegas!

  25 days from today...The Rio wants a large check written.
  The party's on either way, but we have to know how big a room to buy, so if you're coming talk to us!

 The New Religions


 Whose bubble burst?

  Click  Here

"The president spoke as if workaday men and women had let the bubble go
 to their heads like an overdose of champagne and needed a weekend at
 Betty Ford to sober up. He even implied that our passion for bubbly was
 the result of the Clinton era rather than the CEO era, with its weakness
 for stock options and funny math."

"What I'm doing with your money is none of your business.
Why don't you go investigate Clinton - like you were told?"

 Subject: the pigboy gets slammed 3rd hour...7/18

 I was on my way back to work from lunch today and a caller got past the screeners and said:
 "You need to stop lying to your ditto monkeys, PIGBOY"

 It was fucking awesome! Made my day! 3rd hour....about 40 min. in.....
 Rush said some bullshit about not calling names on his show..... just like tits on a boarhog....


 Turtle rescue, rehab and rehoming

 Vic the racist, my knuckle-dragging co-worker, was off Thursday
  and Friday so I had to do his job and mine - not much time for the page.

 One crazy Republican can shut down this page - it's not right.
 If I was GOP, I'd be rich by now and could publish a full issue every day.
 It ain't right.

 Subject: Remembering my dear friend, Jim Hatfield, today

 Today marks the first anniversary since Jim Hatfield committed suicide.
 I hope each of you remembers him, his wife, Nancy and their daughter, Haley, tonight.
 Jim was a brilliant light with a wonderful and talented gift.

 When political allies begin to fight amongst ourselves, I hope each one remembers
 what this fight cost Jim and his family and re-assess priorities.
 I miss Jim very much and think of him and his family often.

 Linda Starr

"Hi, I'm John Fund.
I beat women any?

The beaten woman needs a pit bull with a law degree.

 Subject: I got a tax cut

 Both my wife and I got the full 300 smokes each.
 We gave it to charity.

 Joel Woiton

 Joel, I hate to be the one to tell you, but we all got that $300.
 The bad news is - we had to give it back April 15th.
 It wasn't a tax cut, it was a loan.

 That's my point.

 The surplus went to a tax cut that nobody reading this got.
 It all went to the oil companies and multi-millionaire friends of President Dim Son.

 They read it in Raiatea, French Polynesia, and they live bartcop chat from there, too.
 They read it in Reykjavik, Iceland, where a dude named Thor pretends he's working at the office.
 They read it in Hot Springs, Arkansas at the teacher's retirement home. (Hi, Betty!)

 BartCop, ...come to Vegas!
 BartCop, Vegas is calling you.
 BartCop, over 90 different tequilas at the Hard Rock.....
 BartCop, ...BartCop...

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