Fair & balanced


Before we name more schools & airports after Ronald Reagan, 
can we get a look at what Bush is hiding in Reagan's files?

Bush POWs

Nudity on bartcop

Bush is Pissed

A Slut Named Laura

Judas Maximus

Insane Guns


Tar & Feathers

Illegal to Speak


Catholic Abuses

Chickens Roost

Tim the Ho

Pop Quiz


Photo by Bob Witkowski
Happy Birthday, Bob



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Volume 693 - Here Comes The Son 

 Saturday - January 19, 2002                                                            Recent old stuff                        Online Shopping

VCR Alert - The Strokes and Jack Black on SNL tonite, and something I'm really looking forward to:
 An ex-agent (Quentin Tarantino) leads armed intruders in a takeover of SD-6 on Alias Sunday Night, 


"It was my understanding that an independent counsel was to investigate a crime
  and try to find out who was involved. This independent counsel found a man,
  and then tried to find a crime. And that's why I wouldn't have anything to do with it.

 This is America -- we don't start with a person and then try to find a crime.

 That is just totally wrong. Very early in the investigation it was made very clear to me
 that if I would make allegations concerning a personal relationship with the president,
 then things would go well for me."
   -- Susan McDougal, April 22, 1998

 Integrity  1  firm adherence to a code of especially moral or artistic values : incorruptibility
                          2  synonym see honesty
                          3  example see Susan McDougal

 Dems Should Clobber The GOP With Enron
   by Chris the Screamer Matthews

  Click  Here  to read Chris the Screamer's advice to the Democrats

 In the case of Enron, we are seeing that oil connection in full view, and we're learning the dangers of
 keeping fast company. After all, wasn't Bush the President who wanted to encourage stock ownership?
 Wasn't he the candidate who wanted us to tie up our Social Security in stocks?

 Click  Here  to read my personal e-mail reply to Chris Matthews

 Be sure to get your predictions about the NFL playoffs before the game starts!

From: (withheld)

Subject:  AOL blocks Bartcop?

The day AOL blocks you is the day I change ISP's.
Have a great weekend!

 Reaction to the former "new look" continues
   see  Volume 691 - All Coiled Up and Hissing

> How dramatic.  How stunning.  How HARD TO READ.
> Get rid of it.  Please.

> Damn, I was wishing you were going to keep the black background.
> I think it looks a lot better.
> Somehow or another, it gives it an ALMOST professional look!

> You should do an issue with red lettering and a green background next,
> then my eyes can REALLY bleed!

> thanks for getting rid of the black background; my eyeballs fell out last night
> and i had to retrieve them from under the sofa along with all the cat-spit coated toys.
> all better now.

> I loved the black background!
> I think it looked fantastic!
> I only wish I had written yesterday and told you that (like I wanted to).

> I enjoy your site; but please change the background to something other than black.
> My old eyes have trouble reading your content.

> why is today's issue in black?  It's unreadable.  Please go back to the beige background

Consumer Consumption
    by  Cliff  Downing

 “We’re a big corporation, we can do anything we want.”

  Click  Here

From: withheld@noos.fr

Dear Bartcop,

I love your site. It has helped me deal with the past year of Bush occupation.
I am an American living in Paris and have been very disappointed in the mainstream press.

Thank you for your wonderful site. You are a joy to read every day.
I'll try to send you a picture from here, and if you're ever in Paris, please look me up.
I can't promise the best Tequila but we've got some pretty good wine.

Please keep up the great job you are doing. I'm sure it will pay off financially for you one day.
And I am sure it has already paid off in other, more important ways.

and all the best,


Laure, thanks for that, and yes, send me some pictures.
I've gotten many rewards from doing this site, including a trip to Las Vegas
(that I'm trying to make into a tradition :) and some fine, luxury tequila in the mail.

Thanks to Donzo Dave at AMPOL

"I am the Central Scrutinizer.
 Making fun of my buddy Kenneth Lay, is he?
 Who is this Gonzo Dave character?
 I think we'd better open a file on him, he looks like trouble.
 I might remember his name from an Al Qaeda list.
 Figures he'd be a friend of BartCop's.
 Yep, it's time we cleaned this country up.

 When ditto-monkeys attack!

 Monkey Mail from averill svitsy

  Click  Here

So far, no sticker pics.
Send me your sticker pics!

 Today's hero is named Margie
 Patriot Act - You're right, here's proof

 Click  Here

 Margie, thanks a ton for researching that.

 Thanks also to Brian/ospesp

 Running low on the shampoo and conditioner we got from The Venetian,
 I tried the shampoo and conditioner from The Rio and I think I like it better.

 BartCop!  BartCop!
 Come back to Vegas, BartCop!

Subject: Phillip Schuman's "FDR's Recession"

I read your correspondence with P. Schuman where he heard or read that Clinton was
the first not to have suffered a recession during his term.  I heard the same, but with a qualifier
- Clinton is the first president in US history to have served two terms without a recession.
Hope this helps.

By the way, Smirk is the first US president to have a criminal conviction, the first to desert
the armed forces in wartime, and of course the first to be court-appointed instead of following
the procedures in our Constitution , which has provisions for close elections.

 Tech feedback

 Two things - I solved my extra table problem.
 Swear to Koresh, all I had to do was right-click and hit "delete."
 Next to the man some call "president," I gotta be the dumbest load there is.
 Thanks to all the people who wrote with a solution.

 Next thing - people write now & then and ask why I've stopped writing.

 The answer seems to be to either hit "refresh" or empty your cache.

 Michael wrote:

I was having a similar problem with MWO.  When I dumped my web cache files and refreshed the site,
the new page would come up.  I had no idea where the old page kept coming from, until I figured out
that my browser had "use proxy server" checked. Now its fine.

(in IE, tools>internet options>connections>lan settings)

Too bad I cant get your site at work.
It is blocked by iPrism, a filter made by St. Bernard Software, under the category of "pornography".

ha ha
It's not pornography, it's call the TRUTH!
The truth just seems like pornography to lying sons of bitches.

All you have to do to get around this, and the AOL blocking, however, is to type bartcop.com into google
and click on the link for the cached version there.  Almost every day, google caches your latest issue.
The links are still blocked, but at least I can get the main page.

Yes, but... if you put your mouse over the link, the file name will appear at the bottom of your screen
and once you see the name of the file you can type it in. Granted, the links to news sites are sometimes
a thousand characters long, but local files will have short names.

BTW - love your site!
Please don't use my name, this could get me in trouble at work.

ha ha
I understand - people can't be associated with a pornographer like Ol' BartCop,
but you  can  get to the web sites of the vulgar Pigboy and Laura the panty-dropper.

 Palestinian TV-Radio Complex Destroyed

  Click  Here

 Israeli troops seized the official Palestinian television and radio broadcasting building
 and blew it up Saturday in the latest action to pressure Yasser Arafat and the Palestinian Authority.

 I hesistate to get into this, because I know less about the Palestinian problem than anybody except
 the man some call "president," but from what I know, I support the move. I have an idea how to
 make it an even more powerful message - Israel should issue a press release today saying after
 the next religio-crazy bomber explodes, they will bulldoze a few blocks of Palestinian homes
 and businesses, and list the areas scheduled to be destroyed.

 So in a few days, when the religio-nuts do what they do, those listed blocks disappear.
 Then issue another press release with an even larger section of town for next time.
 Boom = that section is now gone, then release a map of an even bigger chunk of land for next time.
 Every bomb that goes off costs them, say, two percent of their buildings.
 If they keep bombing, after 50 additional blasts, there will be no more Palestinian buildings.

 This will be the Palestinians destroying their own homes.

 If they enjoy having homes and living indoors, they stop the bombings.

 Polite ditto-monkey mail
  Don't get much of this - must read!

  Click  Here

From: carmenbeck@hotmail.com

Subject: Clinton worked even while getting a blowjob - Bush vacations during war??

Hey, Bartcop!

During the whole "Monicagate" hearings, Monica Lewinsky said that while she was servicing
the last elected President that we had, he was on the phone with members of Congress and
various other notables, taking care of business.  Now, that's a President!

Bush, on the other hand, can't go a month without running to his ranch in Texas to take a vacation.
From what?
All of the hard work Karl Rove is doing?
What a puss.

Keep up the great work, at least until you hear Ashcroft's minions goosestepping up your driveway.


 Miss Golden Globes

 Every year, a daughter of a celebrity is Miss Golden Globes.
 (Tomorrow night, same time Tarantino shoots up Alias)
 Who gets the honor this year?

 Pat Benatar's daughter is this year's Miss Golden Globes?
 Have you seen her?
 Good God, she's only 16 and she looks like this?

 I have a rule that I don't lust after minors.
 Well, it's more of a guideline than a rule, I suppose...

 ...she's really only 16?


 I am so much deeper into Garbage than I was yesterday. I attended a "record convention"
 Saturday in K-Drag, and I picked up a two-hour video compilation of Garbage stuff.

 - a mini-concert in Paris from 1999,
 - The making of the The World is Not Enough video from the James Bond movie.
 - a Saturday Night Live appearance
 - a Shirley interview with Craig Kilborn (Kilborn mentioned how the songs stick in his head)
 - a Letterman appearance
 - the Garbage edition of MTV's Fanatic
 - a Jools Holland appearance
 - Shirley on Politically Incorrect (We're political twins, she railed against that prick Ken Starr)
 - a Tonight Show appearance
 - Campus Invasion, whatever that is (It's 2 hours, haven't seen the whole tape yet)
 - and their VH-1 Fashion Awards appearance

 I'm sinking deeper and deeper into this Garbage obsession. I don't want to annoy you with it,
 so I think after today, I'll just put up "Garbage" with a link so you can pass it by.

 BTW, great Shirley interview Here
  Thanks to Kai!

 This problem I mentioned yesterday about the Garbage songs stuck in my head?
 Any chance you'd want to participate in an experiment?
 I want to see if it hits you the same way.
 There's no right or wrong, here, ...unless you disagree with me :)

 Here's the deal:

 Remember the old potatoe* chip slogan - "Bet you can't eat just one?"
 I'll bet that if you listen to this 75-second clip TWICE,
 I'll bet you press the "repeat" button a third time.


 Since this is a 75-second clip from a Garbage "fog" song, you gotta let me set it up.

 I don't DO lyrics, but I think she's trying to break up with a guy, but he's got a spell on her,
 similar, I suppose, to the spell she has on me, but in the song, she's confronting him with her anger.
 She tells him,

"I'm not like all the other girls
  I won't take it like the other girls
  I won't fake it like the other girls
   ...that you used to know"

 ...but then check what happens.

 You can feel the ice crack.
 Shirley crumbles.
 She's human.
 She's tough, she's a fighter, but the pull is too strong.
 As she's laying out her demands, she stops and just falls into this guy all over again.

 There's this loooooong pause...  then,

"...you're taking me over
  Over and over
  I'm falling over
  Over and over"

 The guy gives her a flirty look and she crumbles.
 he's taking her over,  ...over and over...

 Have you ever heard a song with this much drama and passion?
 If you have, I'll bet it's another Garbage song.
 And isn't their sound spooky and dreamy?

 This is what life and love and lust is about.
 Strong as Shirley is, she's weak, just like you and me.
 The emotion and lust are overwhelming her, it's off the scale.

 This is why I say Garbage is the best band working today.
 This much emotional complexity is packed into a four minute song?
 Who else can do this?

 ...and I'm attempting to bring it to you in a 75-second MP3.
 So anyway, here's the challenge:
 Listen to the clip twice.

 If you don't have to hear it a THIRD time, then you're a winner.
 I'll bet you can't resist. I'll bet you push play a third time.

 In closing (massive applause) listen to the clip twice, you'll be hooked.

 Tell me I'm wrong.

 Click  Here  to take the Garbage test.

Shirley Manson, contact  bartcop.com

 I'm starting an "Oprah call Dave" thing with Shirley.

Shirley Manson, contact  bartcop.com

From: egomedic@yahoo.com

Subject: Greatness


The US recovery from the Great Depression by a massive influx of public money in the form of public works
projects such as the Tennesee Valley Authority (which brought electricity to millions of homes in the South)
and Boulder Dam......the US fighting not one but 2 major wars at the same time against true evil and
winning both.......the single largest technological leap in human history in the design and construction
of the atomic bomb (unfortunatly nescessary)......and last but not least, the Apollo moon project.

All of the aformentioned were accomplished under Democratic Presidents and Democratic Congresses.
And who says that Democrats don't inspire our nation to greatness?

Imagine proposing something like Project Apollo now.



 "I don't know if Brett Favre has the weapons the other guy has..."
   -- Dan Reeves, who lost to both teams, predicting victory for the Rams tomorrow

"X-Files'' star David Duchovny will likely pop up on the show again - now that it's been canceled.

Duchovny, who played Special Agent Fox Mulder for 81/2 seasons, left the show last year - vowing
never to return after settling a long legal dispute with Fox and the show's creator, Chris Carter.

But after Carter decided to end the series late Wednesday night, he spoke to Duchovny
who agreed to return in time for the series finale.

 Saw it on 

Will Marty win a Golden Globe for Best Entertainment site on a political treehouse?

Happy Birthday to...

    Coach's wife Shelley is 58

 Also born today - "Mr. Baltimore," Edgar Allan Poe (1809)   Edith Bunker (1923)  Janis Joplin (1943)
 and Hans Hotter (1909)  (I don't know either, but I love that name!)

 I want you ladies to know I'm catching a lot of hell from the guys
 for running pictures of men yesterday :)

 ...the BartCop Hex!
 I'm so scared, I'm flying to Nebraska again!

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 Shirley Manson, contact  bartcop.com

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